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General Parenting
difficult child's therapist - frustrated
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 287802" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Oh, wow- this sounds like my frustrations with tdocs I'd tried with difficult child. I'll fill you in on what I have figured out so far. 1) If they are to be the difficult child's therapist, they like to get to know them first- I guess they think they can figure out the parents' perspective- but also, I can see the point in the primary "relationship" being between the therapist and the difficult child. 2) Most of them move next to bringing the parent in and addressing some "issue" that a parent considers inconsequencial and makiing the parent feel like they've been doing something wrong, when it's the parent feeling like the kid has been slack on that issue. (I have come to wonder if this is a strategy to get the parent to concede so when a bigger issue comes up the difficult child is expected to concede, if it serves to make it obvious to the difficult child that they are really the one slacking on an issue that they have complained about to the therapist or that the therapist noticed, or if it's just an "introduction" to family therapy that the therapist really believes is needed.) 3) In our case, it ALWAYS lead to more problems at home between difficult child and me- to the point that going thru this typical process became out of the question. Some families have had great success with this but I have no idea how. I always thought it would help me a great deal if the therapist filled me in on what these steps were but that never happened.</p><p></p><p>I feel for you. Are you comfortable enough with the therapist to call and discuss it?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 287802, member: 3699"] Oh, wow- this sounds like my frustrations with tdocs I'd tried with difficult child. I'll fill you in on what I have figured out so far. 1) If they are to be the difficult child's therapist, they like to get to know them first- I guess they think they can figure out the parents' perspective- but also, I can see the point in the primary "relationship" being between the therapist and the difficult child. 2) Most of them move next to bringing the parent in and addressing some "issue" that a parent considers inconsequencial and makiing the parent feel like they've been doing something wrong, when it's the parent feeling like the kid has been slack on that issue. (I have come to wonder if this is a strategy to get the parent to concede so when a bigger issue comes up the difficult child is expected to concede, if it serves to make it obvious to the difficult child that they are really the one slacking on an issue that they have complained about to the therapist or that the therapist noticed, or if it's just an "introduction" to family therapy that the therapist really believes is needed.) 3) In our case, it ALWAYS lead to more problems at home between difficult child and me- to the point that going thru this typical process became out of the question. Some families have had great success with this but I have no idea how. I always thought it would help me a great deal if the therapist filled me in on what these steps were but that never happened. I feel for you. Are you comfortable enough with the therapist to call and discuss it? [/QUOTE]
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difficult child's therapist - frustrated
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