Divorce joke...heard on radio

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DammitJanet, Nov 14, 2007.

  1. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Husband and wife are driving down the road together with the wife driving. Wife is driving along at 55mph on the interstate.

    Husband looks over at her and says "Honey, I have decided that I want a divorce."

    Wife says nothing but slowly increases her speed to 65 mph.

    Husband continues to talk and says "Dear, I met a new woman who is 25 years old and I want to start all over again."

    Wife continues to drive in silence but increases her speed to 75 mph.

    Husband says "I want the house, the car, and the bank accounts."

    Wife says nothing and increases her speed to 85 mph and starts to veer the car towards the side of the road.

    Husband looks over at the wife and asks the wife "Isnt there anything you want?"

    Right before the wife slams her car into a cement bridge she says "No, I have everything I need. I have the air bag!"

    LMAO.
     
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

    I can sooooo see myself in that senerio. lol
     
  3. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    I LIKE that one!
     
  4. KFld

    KFld New Member

    Good one!!
     
  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Karen...I so thought of you when I heard that joke on the radio!
     
  6. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    OHHhhhhhh snicker snicker...
     
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    LOVE it!!! I told husband before we got married that it was permanent. Only death gets you out. And he can't even kill bugs. Takes them outside.

    Heh heh heh.
     
  8. guest3

    guest3 Guest

    sad I find comfort in this joke LOL
     
  9. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    I remember seeing a divorce t-shirt, it was covered in one-liners about divorce. I can only remember one of them:

    Want to lose 150 pounds of unsightly fat? Divorce him!

    Marg
     
  10. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

  11. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Grandpa

    A man and his wife are having a fight. The man says, "I was a fool when I married you!" The wife replies, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and I didn't notice."

    "Congratulations, my boy!" said the uncle. "You'll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your life." "But I'm not getting married until tomorrow," the groom protested. "I know," replied the uncle.
     
  12. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Grandpa

    OUch, this one may be too close to home for many of us:

    These days, parents pray the youngest child will get married and move out before the oldest one gets divorced and moves back in.
     
  13. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Grandpa

    OK, just one more.

    What does divorce prove? That your mother was right.
     
  14. I'm going crazy!!!

    I'm going crazy!!! New Member

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: susiestar</div><div class="ubbcode-body">LOVE it!!! I told husband before we got married that it was permanent. Only death gets you out. And he can't even kill bugs. Takes them outside.

    Heh heh heh.

    </div></div> mine wont kill a bug either and gets mad at me when i do
    :rofl:
     
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