dlgallant's post moved here...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Suz, Jun 13, 2008.

  1. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    My difficult child just had her baby after 3 months of bed rest, and I worked from home to care for her. As soon as the baby was 2 months old she hit the streets again. I found on my computer where she had posted online while on bedrest that she was working as an exocitc dancer, and had signed up for an online prostitution site. Fortunately, she never even opened the responses to her post. I believe this time will be the time she steps away from pretending to be "bad girl" and actually living it. I feel like a bad mother because I've given up hoping she'll turn around, and just wish she wouldn't do this in the small town we live in. She has moved in with her dad (who not only molested her but tried to kill us multiple times, he liked fires) and tells everyone that will listen how I destroyed her life and makes up outrageous stories about me. It hurts a lot less than it used to, but the sting will never go away I'm so sorry you're going through this.

    dlgallant
     
  2. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    I'm sorry about your daughter's choices. It has to be heartbreaking. What is really tragic is what she is exposing her baby to.

    Does her father have any kind of police record due to the molestations and violence? No way should her innocent baby be exposed to this way of life or that history. Will you be contacting CPS to help that poor child?

    Suz
     
  3. janebrain

    janebrain New Member

    Hi,
    I just saw where you were replying to my old post. My dtr is still an exotic dancer but she moved from upstate NY out to Seattle. It is a licensed industry out there and I don't think she dances totally nude anymore. I'm no longer upset about it, she makes good money and can support herself. She is pregnant though so she will only be dancing a few more weeks since she is starting to show.

    My easy child son just moved out to Seattle last week. He had started a cheesesteak business in our town a year ago but he and his partner started with too little money and couldn't make a go of it. He was feeling so depressed over this, feeling like a failure, owes lots of money, etc. My dtr invited him out to Seattle and he decided to go. I am glad they will have each other for support, they are very close.

    Thanks,
    Jane
     
  4. dlgallant

    dlgallant New Member

    My ex has had 2 arrests for felony assault, both time elderly men. He likes the defenseless. I have stacks of mental health records, once he was forced into a psychiatric hospital for 2 weeks after an attempt to shoot me. But, all this was available when he was given unrestricted visitation with my daugther. The entire judicial system decided, that since he had never actually killed anyone, he couldn't possibly be that big of a threat. His records also document his admissions of sexual assault. I also have letters / documents showing my daughter's admissions of prostitution. I've contacted DHS, but I have no hope that they will at all get involved. I had just gotten to the point to truly distance myself from my daughter, and now I'm grieving over my beautiful little grand-daughter.
     
  5. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    I remember you from last year, but I don't quite remember your whole story. Could you do a signature so we can get to know you?
     
  6. dlgallant

    dlgallant New Member

    I hadn't even noticed my signature gone with the new format. Yes, I've been gone for a while. I was still in so much pain then I wasn't up to the harsh comments from one. As I'm dealing with this current bout, I remembered how much comfort and strength I received from so many here, so I'm back. Thank you all for being here.
     
  7. ScentofCedar

    ScentofCedar New Member

    It helped me to light a candle for my son, when I didn't know what else to do.

    Maybe that will help you a little too, during this time when everything looks so dark.

    I am glad you came back to us.

    Barbara
     
  8. dlgallant

    dlgallant New Member

    I finally heard from my daughter tonight. She's moved to yet another place to stay on someone's couch. She says she loves me and hasn't been speaking to me because of all the bad things I've been saying about her. I will never understand the rules. She gets mad when I look for her, mad when don't, mad when I try to get her help, and mad when I don't. I didn't want to inflame the situation, nor did I want to let her off the hook. I just emailed her back that I wasn't clear what bad things I had been saying but that I fully understood how hurtful that it is because I too was hearing terrible things said about me. I told her to take care of her herself and her baby. I'm not going to participate in her fantasy world she's created to live in and I've given up trying to reach her.

    Finally I got someone from social services to speak to me today. She says she thinks my daughter has a dissociative personality disorder and is taking this seriously. She's very unhappy with my daughter's nomadic lifestyle. The bad news is, she's bound by county lines and as long as my daughter is floating all over the state, no one is likely to intervene with the baby. If she'll stay put long enough to get served her court appearance, she'll be off to the county jail for 30 days, and hopefully the baby will be in a safe home.
     
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