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Substance Abuse
Does it ever end?
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 751289" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Welcome Taylor. Almost all of us are in or have been in your situation. Change the names and the drugs and the ages and we're all of us equal. And all of us are or have dealt with the crippling fear of what could be. It is horrifying. I wake up many mornings with dread. </p><p></p><p>The way I see it, your hands are tied. Even if you wanted to, you can't let your son come home. Protecting your grandchild and his son make this impossible. But even if this were not the case, it would not be in your son's best interest for you to solve this for him. He has got to deal with this himself. He is a middle aged man. </p><p></p><p>People are all of the time recovering from drugs. But they don't do it because their mother is worried and frightened. They do it because they decide that they want no more of the degraded way they live. I was going to AA for awhile, and I saw all kinds of people decide to work on their recovery. And they are doing it. They were no different than your son. My son lived at a sober living house for a while. I saw men in their fifties and sixties there. They were recovering after decades of drug use and homelessness. Not everybody makes it, that's true. But this is your son's battle to fight. As mothers we need to let them. To get out of their way.</p><p></p><p>I live in an area with crazy drug use and homelessness in parts of our town. Mostly downtown. In fact, where my son and M are living there is a house two doors away that has been overrun by homeless/drug users. There have been 3 fires in the past year and a half. Two of them were near the main gasline. Finally, the city is acting. They wanted to seize the whole property but the judge said if the owner does not repair the back house (like with mine, there are 2 houses on the lot) by the end of the month, the city will tear down the structure! I feel certain that if the owner does not deal with the front house, they will seize the property in its entirety. The community police person who is in charge told me that the city will take control of the house, will repair it completely, and they will sell it at market price. The owner will get nothing because out of the proceeds he will have to pay for all of the fire trucks and police as well as the repairs to the house. That's what she said. </p><p></p><p>So. In my area too, they are seizing houses.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 751289, member: 18958"] Welcome Taylor. Almost all of us are in or have been in your situation. Change the names and the drugs and the ages and we're all of us equal. And all of us are or have dealt with the crippling fear of what could be. It is horrifying. I wake up many mornings with dread. The way I see it, your hands are tied. Even if you wanted to, you can't let your son come home. Protecting your grandchild and his son make this impossible. But even if this were not the case, it would not be in your son's best interest for you to solve this for him. He has got to deal with this himself. He is a middle aged man. People are all of the time recovering from drugs. But they don't do it because their mother is worried and frightened. They do it because they decide that they want no more of the degraded way they live. I was going to AA for awhile, and I saw all kinds of people decide to work on their recovery. And they are doing it. They were no different than your son. My son lived at a sober living house for a while. I saw men in their fifties and sixties there. They were recovering after decades of drug use and homelessness. Not everybody makes it, that's true. But this is your son's battle to fight. As mothers we need to let them. To get out of their way. I live in an area with crazy drug use and homelessness in parts of our town. Mostly downtown. In fact, where my son and M are living there is a house two doors away that has been overrun by homeless/drug users. There have been 3 fires in the past year and a half. Two of them were near the main gasline. Finally, the city is acting. They wanted to seize the whole property but the judge said if the owner does not repair the back house (like with mine, there are 2 houses on the lot) by the end of the month, the city will tear down the structure! I feel certain that if the owner does not deal with the front house, they will seize the property in its entirety. The community police person who is in charge told me that the city will take control of the house, will repair it completely, and they will sell it at market price. The owner will get nothing because out of the proceeds he will have to pay for all of the fire trucks and police as well as the repairs to the house. That's what she said. So. In my area too, they are seizing houses. [/QUOTE]
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