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General Parenting
Does nothing work for your kid like it does the rest of the world?
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 215276" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Qut. making. suggestions. It took me three years to learn that one. Sympathize -- "I'm sorry you're cold." -- and leave it at that. Let her figure out a way to get warm without inconveniencing the rest of the family.</p><p> </p><p>I really like SW's idea of making her responsible for the thermostat with a note saying minimum/maximum and consequences if it goes higher/lower. The one thing I would add is the times the higher/lower setting is applicable. Something like 8 am-10 pm no higher than 72; 10:01 pm-7:59 am no higher than 65.</p><p> </p><p>You really and truly do have a clone of my daughter. There is no way you can fix things for her. She already knows what she wants YOU to do about the problem (turn up the heat, do the homework for her, take her to the mall to get the only necklace in the world that will go with that top, etc.), she doesn't care if there are other solutions. She'll find a reason why nothing works but what she wants. So, quit trying to fix them. Let her suffer. Do let her know you care but don't give in and let her have her way. Acknowledge that her room is cold and then admit you just can't afford to have the heat up high enough to satisfy her needs.</p><p> </p><p>I was amazed that when my daughter saw that I really and truly wasn't going to try to make things right for her any longer, she did start doing for herself a lot more. It took some time since we both had habits we had to break but what a difference. She really is old enough to take responsibility for herself. Tell her it is time for her to start growing up and she is going to have to come up with solutions that will get her what she wants without making the rest of the world miserable,</p><p> </p><p>In the meantime, major HUGS. I know how draining the "it won'Tourette's Syndrome" are.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 215276, member: 3626"] Qut. making. suggestions. It took me three years to learn that one. Sympathize -- "I'm sorry you're cold." -- and leave it at that. Let her figure out a way to get warm without inconveniencing the rest of the family. I really like SW's idea of making her responsible for the thermostat with a note saying minimum/maximum and consequences if it goes higher/lower. The one thing I would add is the times the higher/lower setting is applicable. Something like 8 am-10 pm no higher than 72; 10:01 pm-7:59 am no higher than 65. You really and truly do have a clone of my daughter. There is no way you can fix things for her. She already knows what she wants YOU to do about the problem (turn up the heat, do the homework for her, take her to the mall to get the only necklace in the world that will go with that top, etc.), she doesn't care if there are other solutions. She'll find a reason why nothing works but what she wants. So, quit trying to fix them. Let her suffer. Do let her know you care but don't give in and let her have her way. Acknowledge that her room is cold and then admit you just can't afford to have the heat up high enough to satisfy her needs. I was amazed that when my daughter saw that I really and truly wasn't going to try to make things right for her any longer, she did start doing for herself a lot more. It took some time since we both had habits we had to break but what a difference. She really is old enough to take responsibility for herself. Tell her it is time for her to start growing up and she is going to have to come up with solutions that will get her what she wants without making the rest of the world miserable, In the meantime, major HUGS. I know how draining the "it won'Tourette's Syndrome" are. [/QUOTE]
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Does nothing work for your kid like it does the rest of the world?
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