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Does TV play a role?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 215945" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Mstang, you said, "I also believe that if something is acting as a trigger or agitator....remove or restrict it wheneve possible."</p><p></p><p>That's exactly right. We found some games would upset difficult child 3 to stir him up, and there wasn't necessarily any logic to it. We have a logic game on our computer called "Mission Thunderbolt". We had another VERY old Mac game called "Pyramid". We had to ban all the kids form these games until they could play them without it causing nightmares. Both are games you can just stop playing and walk away, nothing bad will happen while you take a walk. It's move-based, a bit like a simplistic Dungeons and Dragons. You have your turn, the computer has it's turn, then it waits until you have your turn again. But the kids would get so tense and anxious as their character fought his way through the giant spiders and various other wandering monsters (very tiny sprites, so no scary graphics) that they couldn't stop. I wanted them to play these games though, for the way it would develop their problem-solving skills and general fast thinking.</p><p></p><p>Once they were old enough (it varied from kid to kid) they were given access to the games on a trial basis.</p><p></p><p>Certain cartoons are also banned - "South Park" was banned during primary school. It was on too late anyway. But difficult child 3 carried the ban on for more years, because he had been so ingrained into accepting that watching South Park was NOT alright.</p><p></p><p>I used to ban Simpsons. I intensely disliked the apparent praise of mediocrity. However, it has redeemed itself in my eyes with later series; the jokes are funnier the more broad your understanding, so we use it as a springboard to explaining satire as well as WHAT is being satirised.</p><p></p><p>We always have to apply some controls to our childrens' environment. For example, our laws insist that swimming pools and spas need to be protected by pool fence. In the same way, we keep out children safe and monitor their experiences in technology. Or at least, we should. But before we get too distressed by whatever it is they are doing, we need to watch, to observe, and to ask ourselves - what is he getting out of this? Does any harm get outweighed by net benefits?</p><p></p><p>difficult child 3 has been very anxious with any movie that is tense and exciting, and yet for some strange reason he found "Fifth Element" and would watch it obsessively, subtitles on of course. Why? What was he getting out of it? It was violent, yet he watched it. So we let him - it as desensitising him to violence (which he needed - he was oversensitive) and it has made it easier for him to watch other films (such as "The Incredibles") and not get so stressed.</p><p></p><p>I still don't know why difficult child 3 watched Fifth Element. But he felt he needed to, he didn't seem to be picking up bad habits, he asked questions which opened up useful topics of discussion, so we allowed him to do it.</p><p></p><p>All you can do is monitor, think, and make the judgement call that is the right of any parent.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 215945, member: 1991"] Mstang, you said, "I also believe that if something is acting as a trigger or agitator....remove or restrict it wheneve possible." That's exactly right. We found some games would upset difficult child 3 to stir him up, and there wasn't necessarily any logic to it. We have a logic game on our computer called "Mission Thunderbolt". We had another VERY old Mac game called "Pyramid". We had to ban all the kids form these games until they could play them without it causing nightmares. Both are games you can just stop playing and walk away, nothing bad will happen while you take a walk. It's move-based, a bit like a simplistic Dungeons and Dragons. You have your turn, the computer has it's turn, then it waits until you have your turn again. But the kids would get so tense and anxious as their character fought his way through the giant spiders and various other wandering monsters (very tiny sprites, so no scary graphics) that they couldn't stop. I wanted them to play these games though, for the way it would develop their problem-solving skills and general fast thinking. Once they were old enough (it varied from kid to kid) they were given access to the games on a trial basis. Certain cartoons are also banned - "South Park" was banned during primary school. It was on too late anyway. But difficult child 3 carried the ban on for more years, because he had been so ingrained into accepting that watching South Park was NOT alright. I used to ban Simpsons. I intensely disliked the apparent praise of mediocrity. However, it has redeemed itself in my eyes with later series; the jokes are funnier the more broad your understanding, so we use it as a springboard to explaining satire as well as WHAT is being satirised. We always have to apply some controls to our childrens' environment. For example, our laws insist that swimming pools and spas need to be protected by pool fence. In the same way, we keep out children safe and monitor their experiences in technology. Or at least, we should. But before we get too distressed by whatever it is they are doing, we need to watch, to observe, and to ask ourselves - what is he getting out of this? Does any harm get outweighed by net benefits? difficult child 3 has been very anxious with any movie that is tense and exciting, and yet for some strange reason he found "Fifth Element" and would watch it obsessively, subtitles on of course. Why? What was he getting out of it? It was violent, yet he watched it. So we let him - it as desensitising him to violence (which he needed - he was oversensitive) and it has made it easier for him to watch other films (such as "The Incredibles") and not get so stressed. I still don't know why difficult child 3 watched Fifth Element. But he felt he needed to, he didn't seem to be picking up bad habits, he asked questions which opened up useful topics of discussion, so we allowed him to do it. All you can do is monitor, think, and make the judgement call that is the right of any parent. Marg [/QUOTE]
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