Yesterday, I took difficult child shopping with me at the grocery store. We arrived kind of late in the day and as we walked through the front door, I saw that their display of the big "sale item" was empty. I went immediately and started checking throught he boxes, just in case there might have been one left behind...but no such luck.
A gentleman saw me and offered me his. He said he'd grabbed the last one, but he was offering it to me. Are you sure? I don't wanna take yours...
Well, he insisted and he made my day! I thanked him profusely.
Meanwhile, difficult child had been kind of standing aside, just watching. After the gentleman left, she walked over to me and whispered "Boy, I really hate it when people are nice like that."
What? What do you mean?
difficult child explained that she doesn't know what to do when somebody is "nice". She feels that it's weird or creepy, somehow, because these people seem to be acting nice for no reason. That guy didn't ask for money or anything!
I tried explaining that it feels good to be nice and when someone is nice to you, you are supposed to "pay it forward" by being nice to others.
difficult child complained that she IS nice, REALLY nice [**cough, cough** but that's another thread] but it doesn't work that way for her because people are not nice back.
I was really surprised to hear this. Do you think it's a perception problem? difficult child never seems to understand that her behaviors are rude, aggressive, and hurtful to others....and is confused when others are nice?
It makes me wonder whether difficult child views every, daily interaction as a battle, somehow. I've-gotta-get-them-before-they-get-me.
Is your difficult child this way?
A gentleman saw me and offered me his. He said he'd grabbed the last one, but he was offering it to me. Are you sure? I don't wanna take yours...
Well, he insisted and he made my day! I thanked him profusely.
Meanwhile, difficult child had been kind of standing aside, just watching. After the gentleman left, she walked over to me and whispered "Boy, I really hate it when people are nice like that."
What? What do you mean?
difficult child explained that she doesn't know what to do when somebody is "nice". She feels that it's weird or creepy, somehow, because these people seem to be acting nice for no reason. That guy didn't ask for money or anything!
I tried explaining that it feels good to be nice and when someone is nice to you, you are supposed to "pay it forward" by being nice to others.
difficult child complained that she IS nice, REALLY nice [**cough, cough** but that's another thread] but it doesn't work that way for her because people are not nice back.
I was really surprised to hear this. Do you think it's a perception problem? difficult child never seems to understand that her behaviors are rude, aggressive, and hurtful to others....and is confused when others are nice?
It makes me wonder whether difficult child views every, daily interaction as a battle, somehow. I've-gotta-get-them-before-they-get-me.
Is your difficult child this way?