dog question

[mrscatinthehat]

We have three dogs and three cats. I love my animals. The mama kitty and her two babies are fine. Then there is the doxie in my avatar on here that I have had 9 years. Then there is the lab rott mix that husband has had for 13/14 years. Over the last few years we have acquired a dog here or there and had them temporarily for whatever "rescue" purpose has come along.

One of those dogs is our third. He is a toy poodle. We have had him with us for several years now. He was very abused to the point husband had to work to get him to trust him for over a year before he would go to him. He is VERY high maintenance. Not what I would normally lookfor in a dog. He is a sweet dog. But he is frustrating because many of his bad habits aren't removable. He is about 11 from what I understood of how old he was.

My dilemna comes from I hate to abandon any animal. It would be like giving up a child. But like a child sometimes a different environment is what they need. I have put mild inquiries out to people that I thought would do well with him.

He is making me crazy. I don't know what to do. I feel horrid.

beth

 

[klmno]

This sounds like a tough one. Honestly, for what he's gone thru (even though you don't know exactly what that was) and given his age, I would hold onto him if at all possible. If it's not possible, a close family member or friend that you/husband visits often would be the second choice. I know that's probably not what you want to hear, but I'm thinking that he is not going to be one to make it until 16-18yo anyway. I'm sorry- I know it's tough.

 

[donna723]

I'm probably not going to say what you wanted to hear either ... but I think that when you've had a dog for 'several years', they are yours! If you've had him for this long, can you not put up with it for a little longer? Especially a dog that has been abused and one that took so long to learn to trust humans again. I think it would be very cruel to rehome him now, at his age, after all this time, just because he has some bad habits. ALL dogs have at least some bad habits, and even the worst of them can be improved upon. This dog knows nothing but your home and your family now and would probably be terrified to suddenly find himself 'rehomed'.

 

[Suz]

I'm sorry, Beth. I agree with KLMNO and Donna.

My sweet cockapoo Chloe is a barrel-full of neuroses. It's annoying and exasperating. I don't know if it's the poodle part that was over bred, the cocker part, or the cockapoo part. She came from a puppymill and something sure went wrong.

Still, I'm all she knows.

I'm sorry your baby is driving you nuts. Your family is all he knows, too. Please try to hang in there.

Suz

 

[mrscatinthehat]

I keep trying. He was never meant to be permanent but somehow he was one no one wanted. That is why he is still here. I said I feel horrible about it. Ugh. I mean right now he is laying in the chair with the doxie and being good. It's almost like he knew I typed about him.

I think part of the problem is when we got him difficult child situations were at the max and I didn't necesarily notice all of his little things. Now that it has been relatively quiet (I am not really saying that because we all know what happens then) I notice things much more.

It's not that I really want to get rid of him I just keep getting so frustrated.

beth

 

[donna723]

I hope you can try to cut him a little slack. If he's eleven, that's quite elderly for a dog, and any dog is going to have some problems and need a little more care and understanding when they get older. Poodles can be prone to eye problems too and he may have developed cataracts, even if you can't see them. I have three dogs, all with their own issues and little annoying things that they do, just like people. I have one who unzips the sofa cushions and then crawls inside them to sleep in the stuffings! I hope you can get some help for the behavior problems, but I think it would be extremely hard on him to suddenly be taken away from everything he knows and placed in another home, especially at his age. Dogs aren't 'disposable'.

 

[mrscatinthehat]

I didn't think he was disposable! You know we come here for help with our kids and pets and other things. I didn't realize that by coming with a problem that I very much said I felt bad about I would be made to fell worse. I love my animals. I always have. I am just very frustrated. Pardon me for coming to those that I thought would be understanding.

 

[KTMom91]

I understand what you mean, Beth. All of our animals are either "pound or found," and they can come with serious baggage. And some of their baggage is difficult to deal with. Are there any medications for the poodle that might help him with some of his habits? My Buddy had a bump on his hip he kept licking, so we had it removed...now he licks the sore and it hasn't completely healed. He's also overprotective of me...he bit my mother on the arm because he thought she was threatening me. Don't know what your dog's issues are, just tossing some ideas out.

Hugs.

 

[witzend]

Beth, I do understand. The dog is like a member of the family. You feel responsible. But, you are looking for responsible people to take him and maybe the person he needs to be with is out there waiting for him. Big hugs.

I often think of fostering, but know that I would never be able to do it. I'm too persnickerty when it comes to pets, and I just wouldn't have the patience. You've done a really wonderful thing that not everyone would or could do.

 

[Hound dog]

Beth

A difficult child dog can drive you nearly as crazy as a difficult child person/kid. Seriously, I've have more than a few of them over the years.

Most dogs can be retrained to do/not do what you want. Poodles are normally quite smart. (but also can be stubborn) Maybe you could put some of his issues up and see if there is possible help for them.

Now my Betsy girl, I just love her to pieces. Dog is reeking with love and personality. But she's a naughty girl when it comes to plastic cups. You see it's her weakness. Taught to her by her loving mother. I've grown accustomed to it finally and it no longer bothers me too much. Nichole on the other hand, it drives up the wall. lol But I can actually laugh at how much fun this dog can have with a simple disposable cup.

She's also naughty about jumping up. I've worked with her, but the kids undo it. I'll work harder with her once I get the chance.

I know you feel bad about giving the dog up. Afterall, you're the one who rescued him in the first place. At his age, and after all you've already been thru with him and all the work you've put into him.....if it were me his gfgness would have to be severe to give him up at this point. Odds are he doesn't have long to live anyway. And it may be nightmarish for him to attempt to adjust into another household at this point.

This is why nothing will make me give up Molly or Rowdy, even if they'd have to live with me in my car. They're too old now to adjust to a new family. Wouldn't happen. They're too loyal to this family, and most especially me. It would crush them to be given away. And if you've ever seen a dog grieve.......I just couldn't do that to them.

If his issues are severe enough you think a new home is best........I'd make it a slow adoption process. Let him gradually get used to his new family by setting up a visitation schedule, then an overnight schedule, then the transfer. This would also let new family see if they can handle his difficult child habits. Because after so long and so much work it would be a shame for him to get a new home and the new family to decide his bad habits are too much and ship him off to a shelter. (happens)

But no, you're not a bad person. A difficult child dog can be mighty hard to live with.

Hugs

 

[klmno]

You've probably looked into this already, but just in case I'll throw it out. If the dog has recently changed some of this behavior- such as peeing all the time in the house- it is worth a vet check. Just like with our difficult child's, sometimes there's another issue going on especially as they get older and start developing health problems.