Don't know if I did the right thing?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by lovelyboy, May 7, 2012.

  1. lovelyboy

    lovelyboy Member

    Went to see my oldest difficult child psychiatrist for 3 months follow up today.....She is VERY happy with his progress! Says he is the best she has ever seen him! He even gave her a smile or two and cracked yokes with her! WOW! So she only wants to see him in 6 months time....I feel a bit misrable because she didnt want to take him of his SSRI...he is on lowest dose....She says he is doing so well now, why rock the boat!:(
    She put me on new medications....says she is worried because it seems as if I am slipping into depression with all that was going on during the last week......with biodad dying exct......:(
    I mentioned to her about little one who is struggling with sensory processing disorder (SPD) and Auditory Processing Disorders (APD) and all the stuff going on with him.....She said she wants to see him for an assessment in the next month......I asked her what more can be done, he is seing Occupational Therapist (OT) and ST....said she just want to see if there isn't something going on.....
    My mom was upset with me for making an appointment....says there is nothing wrong with him....I must leave him and give him a chance to just grow up a bit....he will cath up......Now I wonder if I wasn't jumping the gun....shouldn't I have waited a bit longer......
    Ok and off coarse she also said that we just needed to dissipline more......and the rest.....
    I worry that this is just maybe going to put a label around his neck.....how long does a person wait things out to see if it will improve......? When do you decide it"s time to see a psychiatrist.....Am I being to hasty?
     
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    How long do you wait?
    If YOUR mommy gut said to speak up, then you do not wait.
    YOU have a better gut feel of the situation than anybody else on the planet. Period.

    I have yet to see a complex child "grow out" of his/her problems. Ever.
    I HAVE seen the cost of not getting the interventions early enough (i.e. HS instead of early elementary)... waiting did NOT help.
    School wanted me to believe that it would, though. So did two sets of grandparents.
     
  3. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    LB, I totally and completely agree with Insane. Trust your mommy gut. THAT is the only thing you should be listening to. I, too, (and of course difficult child 1) have suffered because of waiting too long AND listening 100% to ONE professional (who turned out to be 100% wrong). My mother still thinks difficult child 1 was diagnosed with what he has solely based on MY "version" of the facts so that I would get the diagnosis I wanted. That's how convoluted HER thinking is and her denial is astronomical.

    Go with your gut and ignore what others say. When my mom talks, I let it go in one ear and out the other. That way she can say what she's going to say and I don't have to listen to it or even acknowledge it.
     
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I third the other two. It is time when YOU feel it is.

    I have a suggestion. Maybe this could be a secret from Mom. She doesn't seem to be supportive. You don't need extra grief right now, hon. Talk to us. We will support you.

    Big hugs. You are doing what you feel is right in your gut. That is the best way! What harm can come from seeing a psychiatrist? None.

    You go, warrier mom!!!
     
  5. keista

    keista New Member

    Short answer is NO, you should not have waited any longer. There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting a professional's input. I'm just guessing that you are concerned the psychiatrist will put your child on medications after the assessment but you feel everything is going OK and aren't even thinking medications at this time. Well, cross that bridge when you get to it. The appointment you made is to get information - what the psychiatrist thinks and what the psychiatrist recommends. If you don't agree, you don't have to follow through. You can still take a 'wait and see' approach if you so choose.
     
  6. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    Lovely, I agree with everyone else: you do what YOU feel is right. Don't let anyone confuse you.
    The most obvious example I have is actually Partner: if I waited and listened to everyone (my parents, pediatrician, etc) I would have never called early intervention. My mother kept on telling me that NOTHING was wrong (Partner could not say a single word at the age of 2! not even Momma). I have seen first hand the effect of early intervention. Probably why I have tried some many things with V.
    Go to your appointment but stay critical. I guess that is the hardest part: follow your gut, but still listen to various opinions and sort it all out without being too confused at the end!
    But if you feel confused and unsure, you can always come here! We'll halp you out. Not that the board is all knowledge, but it gives you different perspective without questionning you.
    Nothing really wrong can come out of an appointment. Whatever is discussed: you still get to decide wether it feels right or not.
     
  7. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    I'm going to throw my hat into the ring and say that you did what you thought was right. Your instinct told you to speak up about a concern that you had and you did it. You did it with only the best of intentions for your child. Never, ever doubt your instincts! They will tell you things that no one else can.
     
  8. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Throwing my 2 cents in too, yup, I say always go with your mother's intuition, you're the one who knows your children the most and the best. You did the right thing, you followed your heart, that's what we Mom's do. Good job.
     
  9. lovelyboy

    lovelyboy Member

    Thanx for your support! It means alot!
     
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