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Don't wake the butterfly, or you'll set off WWIII
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 506355" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>RE: taking his toys as DJ said...</p><p></p><p>Once I knew that Q had the ability to clean (he really would pick things up and not see all of it... he had visual field issues for a while and we worked with a vision therapist) I did do that...</p><p></p><p>I gave him till X time on a visual timer (and now i just say if not done by whatever time and he knows the time...might be by X TV show he wanted to watch....</p><p></p><p>THEN it is MY turn. I use a black bag and pick up everything in the defined area. (by the way, I dont do this in front of him.... I do not pick fights or get angry and grab everything while yelling at him though it IS tempting at times... Once he goes to school or is on to another thing... I do my cleaning and it happens then) It all goes in the bag. I put it in my closet which is out of bounds to him. Once he starts cleaning... we can earn things back...(sometimes he can do other things to earn some back, just depends) .... Give a chance to really learn the pattern though even if he can clean he may have issues right now that are interfering so work through those first to help and then once he shows he can do it without falling apart you can consequence. I will say that if a consequence does not result in improved behavior over time, then it is likely that as most of us find out in such situations, he does not have all of the skills needed to do the task, behavior, or whatever it is you are working on.</p><p></p><p>Cleaning takes far more than just doing it... like you said, he can do it hand over hand. maybe even on his own under certain situations. But if you look at all of the issues that often affect kids with autism (transitions, frustration tolerance, following directions issues, being overwhelmed etc...) you may need to work on those other issues too. I suspect he has other times he is very non compliant for similar reasons???? So, working on those things can spread to other times that you tell him what to do.</p><p></p><p>In any method, like the hand over hand thing, if it does not produce results then it is time to move on to another plan. when people write plans for my son I schedule a review of the data every three weeks. It is amazing how people will just keep going with a plan just because they worked so hard to set it up and trained to do it or they just get in the routine of doing it that way. But when they finally come six months later and say it didn't work I about go nuts so now I put time lines in all of our plans.</p><p></p><p>Have you read the explosive child or what your explosive child is trying to tell you? One other thing I was thinking is to ask yourself if this is one of the baskets (behavior groups put into "baskets") you are ready to work on? Once you make a list of ALL of the behaviors that are concerning and then put them into groups/priorities and then start working on them little by little.... it really can make a difference.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 506355, member: 12886"] RE: taking his toys as DJ said... Once I knew that Q had the ability to clean (he really would pick things up and not see all of it... he had visual field issues for a while and we worked with a vision therapist) I did do that... I gave him till X time on a visual timer (and now i just say if not done by whatever time and he knows the time...might be by X TV show he wanted to watch.... THEN it is MY turn. I use a black bag and pick up everything in the defined area. (by the way, I dont do this in front of him.... I do not pick fights or get angry and grab everything while yelling at him though it IS tempting at times... Once he goes to school or is on to another thing... I do my cleaning and it happens then) It all goes in the bag. I put it in my closet which is out of bounds to him. Once he starts cleaning... we can earn things back...(sometimes he can do other things to earn some back, just depends) .... Give a chance to really learn the pattern though even if he can clean he may have issues right now that are interfering so work through those first to help and then once he shows he can do it without falling apart you can consequence. I will say that if a consequence does not result in improved behavior over time, then it is likely that as most of us find out in such situations, he does not have all of the skills needed to do the task, behavior, or whatever it is you are working on. Cleaning takes far more than just doing it... like you said, he can do it hand over hand. maybe even on his own under certain situations. But if you look at all of the issues that often affect kids with autism (transitions, frustration tolerance, following directions issues, being overwhelmed etc...) you may need to work on those other issues too. I suspect he has other times he is very non compliant for similar reasons???? So, working on those things can spread to other times that you tell him what to do. In any method, like the hand over hand thing, if it does not produce results then it is time to move on to another plan. when people write plans for my son I schedule a review of the data every three weeks. It is amazing how people will just keep going with a plan just because they worked so hard to set it up and trained to do it or they just get in the routine of doing it that way. But when they finally come six months later and say it didn't work I about go nuts so now I put time lines in all of our plans. Have you read the explosive child or what your explosive child is trying to tell you? One other thing I was thinking is to ask yourself if this is one of the baskets (behavior groups put into "baskets") you are ready to work on? Once you make a list of ALL of the behaviors that are concerning and then put them into groups/priorities and then start working on them little by little.... it really can make a difference. [/QUOTE]
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