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Parent Emeritus
Dormant Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) Reactive Attachment Disorder... encouragement welcome!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 319201" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>My son, 32 now, came to us from Hong Kong at age six. He always acted a bit detached, but was delightful to raise...BRILLIANT, sweet, never caused us a day of grief. We thought we'd dodged that Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD).</p><p></p><p>Forget it. Four years ago he met and married a woman of Chinese heritage and after a minor family scuffle he hasn't seen us again nor responded to anyone's contact. We believe he has finally become comfortable in his skin as he has always been keenly aware of and interested in his heritage. He taught himself Mandarin and has been to China three times. He took HER parents on many trips with them. Isn't that nice? We don't matter anymore. Not that we want anything from him, but it hurts to know he thinks so well of them and doesn't even send us Christmas cards.</p><p></p><p>Oddly enough *he* became a very fundamentalist Christian when he met her too and we believe part of his disengagement is that...because we have different religious beliefs and he is now *married* to the church. Ugh. He is making so much money...I cringe thinking of how much he is giving to the church he goes to, which is almost cult-like (example: Christians who are in a denomination do not count as Christians to him).</p><p></p><p>We never had Christian friends and didn't lose any friends over this, but we sure cried a lot. We loved him with all our hearts, and still do, but I doubt we'll ever see him again so we did what we had to do...moved on without him. We can't let his decision dominate the rest of our lives. I try to live by the Serenity prayer...(((Hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 319201, member: 1550"] My son, 32 now, came to us from Hong Kong at age six. He always acted a bit detached, but was delightful to raise...BRILLIANT, sweet, never caused us a day of grief. We thought we'd dodged that Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). Forget it. Four years ago he met and married a woman of Chinese heritage and after a minor family scuffle he hasn't seen us again nor responded to anyone's contact. We believe he has finally become comfortable in his skin as he has always been keenly aware of and interested in his heritage. He taught himself Mandarin and has been to China three times. He took HER parents on many trips with them. Isn't that nice? We don't matter anymore. Not that we want anything from him, but it hurts to know he thinks so well of them and doesn't even send us Christmas cards. Oddly enough *he* became a very fundamentalist Christian when he met her too and we believe part of his disengagement is that...because we have different religious beliefs and he is now *married* to the church. Ugh. He is making so much money...I cringe thinking of how much he is giving to the church he goes to, which is almost cult-like (example: Christians who are in a denomination do not count as Christians to him). We never had Christian friends and didn't lose any friends over this, but we sure cried a lot. We loved him with all our hearts, and still do, but I doubt we'll ever see him again so we did what we had to do...moved on without him. We can't let his decision dominate the rest of our lives. I try to live by the Serenity prayer...(((Hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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Dormant Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) Reactive Attachment Disorder... encouragement welcome!!!
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