Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Dr. Riley checking in to Early Childhood Zone
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Dr. Douglas Riley" data-source="post: 253824" data-attributes="member: 6888"><p>To SRL, regarding labels: I will address my comments to kids in the 3.5 to 5 year-old range, as six and up kids are quite different in many ways. </p><p> </p><p>As for the term Oppositional Defiant Disorder, I am always extremely cautious about the <em>disorder</em> part of the term. The term "disorder" implies a fixed state of being or behavior, and really shoould not be used with kids in this age range. I'm OK with the term "oppositional behavior." You should all know that the term "disorder" is used in order to get insurance companies to pay for the medical/psychiatric/psychological/counseling services. No label, no pay, unfortunately. </p><p> </p><p>That said, still be careful about the term. About the only trait that kids are virtually guaranteed to carry forward from their early years is whether or not they were behaviorally inhibited (shy), or behaviorally disinhibited (bold). Inhibited kids tend to stay inhibited, although there is interesting brain research on the ones who change. In other words, plenty of kids who display oppositional behavior when they are young will not display it at all when they are a few years older. </p><p> </p><p>If you are familiar with my work, you know that I make clear distinctions between oppositional children and explosive children, and I believe it is a major mistake to treat them as if they are one category. Oppositional kids are exquisitely sensitive to power issues, and from early on attempt to pull equal with their parents. Their blowups and battles with you are meant to show you that they will take you on. Explosive children blow up over a wide variety of issues, but when they are young it is typically due to "roadmap" issues and difficulties with unexpected events and transitions. Oppositional children aren't particularly sorry after they blow up, because they see nothing wrong with battling with you. Explosive children are usually remorseful, because they don't like the way they feel after they explode, and they feel bad about their behavior. You cannot treat them both with the same methods, given the vast differences in the underlying causes of their behavior.</p><p> </p><p>So, be very careful of anyone giving your child the ODD label because your child is blowing up and taking you on. It is typically done for insurance purposes, and the best therapists will admit to you that there is a huge chance of the child's behavior being quite different later on. I use the term "painfully normal" for a lot of the behaviors of the youngsters I work with, because what they are doing is painful to be around, but normal, and will get better over time.</p><p> </p><p>There are many theories of how to work with ODD children, so you should read widely. The most pragmatic viewpoint is to use what works, and to avoid thinking that there is any one, single method that will work for all children. (If the methods that worked for your friend's ODD child do not work for yours, it does not in any manner mean you are a failure or a bad parent. It just means you have yet to use the methods that your particular child will respond to.)</p><p> </p><p>As for Conduct Disorder - I would personally be very suspect of anyone who would use that label on the children that we are discussing on this particular board. Children can be amazingly cruel and aggressive when they are young. I've certainly worked with four and five year-olds who seemed to get a great deal of joy out of hurting animals and other children, but I also found that the behaviors decreased markedly when the parents used the correct procedures, and of the children who I have followed for lengthy periods of time, the vast majority of them developed prosocial behaviors. If someone hangs that label on your child, it is a signal to you to, first of all, seek a second opinion by a thoroughly seasoned professional who specializes in children (I always suggest that parents avoid the p and t docs who claim to treat everyone from 3 to 90). Secondly, if someone does offer that label, it is also a signal to you to begin to develop a well thought out behavior modification program so that your child's negative behaviors will not be reinforced, and so his or her positive behaviors are reinforced. In general, again, before you listen to anyone who places such labels on children due to their behavior, make sure that you have thoroughly searched to see if there are other underlying reasons that are causing the child to act the way they act. </p><p> </p><p>Doug Riley</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dr. Douglas Riley, post: 253824, member: 6888"] To SRL, regarding labels: I will address my comments to kids in the 3.5 to 5 year-old range, as six and up kids are quite different in many ways. As for the term Oppositional Defiant Disorder, I am always extremely cautious about the [I]disorder[/I] part of the term. The term "disorder" implies a fixed state of being or behavior, and really shoould not be used with kids in this age range. I'm OK with the term "oppositional behavior." You should all know that the term "disorder" is used in order to get insurance companies to pay for the medical/psychiatric/psychological/counseling services. No label, no pay, unfortunately. That said, still be careful about the term. About the only trait that kids are virtually guaranteed to carry forward from their early years is whether or not they were behaviorally inhibited (shy), or behaviorally disinhibited (bold). Inhibited kids tend to stay inhibited, although there is interesting brain research on the ones who change. In other words, plenty of kids who display oppositional behavior when they are young will not display it at all when they are a few years older. If you are familiar with my work, you know that I make clear distinctions between oppositional children and explosive children, and I believe it is a major mistake to treat them as if they are one category. Oppositional kids are exquisitely sensitive to power issues, and from early on attempt to pull equal with their parents. Their blowups and battles with you are meant to show you that they will take you on. Explosive children blow up over a wide variety of issues, but when they are young it is typically due to "roadmap" issues and difficulties with unexpected events and transitions. Oppositional children aren't particularly sorry after they blow up, because they see nothing wrong with battling with you. Explosive children are usually remorseful, because they don't like the way they feel after they explode, and they feel bad about their behavior. You cannot treat them both with the same methods, given the vast differences in the underlying causes of their behavior. So, be very careful of anyone giving your child the ODD label because your child is blowing up and taking you on. It is typically done for insurance purposes, and the best therapists will admit to you that there is a huge chance of the child's behavior being quite different later on. I use the term "painfully normal" for a lot of the behaviors of the youngsters I work with, because what they are doing is painful to be around, but normal, and will get better over time. There are many theories of how to work with ODD children, so you should read widely. The most pragmatic viewpoint is to use what works, and to avoid thinking that there is any one, single method that will work for all children. (If the methods that worked for your friend's ODD child do not work for yours, it does not in any manner mean you are a failure or a bad parent. It just means you have yet to use the methods that your particular child will respond to.) As for Conduct Disorder - I would personally be very suspect of anyone who would use that label on the children that we are discussing on this particular board. Children can be amazingly cruel and aggressive when they are young. I've certainly worked with four and five year-olds who seemed to get a great deal of joy out of hurting animals and other children, but I also found that the behaviors decreased markedly when the parents used the correct procedures, and of the children who I have followed for lengthy periods of time, the vast majority of them developed prosocial behaviors. If someone hangs that label on your child, it is a signal to you to, first of all, seek a second opinion by a thoroughly seasoned professional who specializes in children (I always suggest that parents avoid the p and t docs who claim to treat everyone from 3 to 90). Secondly, if someone does offer that label, it is also a signal to you to begin to develop a well thought out behavior modification program so that your child's negative behaviors will not be reinforced, and so his or her positive behaviors are reinforced. In general, again, before you listen to anyone who places such labels on children due to their behavior, make sure that you have thoroughly searched to see if there are other underlying reasons that are causing the child to act the way they act. Doug Riley [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Dr. Riley checking in to Early Childhood Zone
Top