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dreading visiting jail!
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<blockquote data-quote="rejectedmom" data-source="post: 109514" data-attributes="member: 2315"><p>Star was very graphic and precise in her description. you will definately be overwhelmed by the experience. My husband who is not an emotional guy had a hard time with the visits and would be depressed both before and afterwards. I personally chose not to visit my son in prison for various reasons mostly because I had told him over and over when he began down the dark road that lead to that place that if he ended up there I would not visit. I said that I didn't do jail and he needed to learn that I ment it. My husband went about once a month and like I said it was hard on him. Like DDD, we took all the phone calls and we wrote letters. We made sure we kept some money in difficult child's account so he could buy extra food and stamps and stationary to write to us. We sent books on self improvement, faith, and crossword books and novels to keep him occupied. difficult child never faulted us. He was appreciative of all that we did. In truth it was very hard all around but we got through it. </p><p></p><p>I guess what you can gather from all the posts in answer to your question is that you need to take care of yourself first. No matter what you decide to do, it is going to be hard. I for one am very glad I do not have the visual memories of my son in prison to haunt me every Christmas. </p><p></p><p>We are all different in what we want to do and not do. But we all suffer just the same. I think the key is to do whatever causes the least suffering. </p><p></p><p>My husband went two days before Christmas. That gave us the relieve of knowing that difficult child had a visitor and knew that we had him in our thoughts and at the same time gave us time to get over the depression associated with a prison visit. Having time to regroup gave us the ability to enjoy our holiday in spite of the circumstances of our lives.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rejectedmom, post: 109514, member: 2315"] Star was very graphic and precise in her description. you will definately be overwhelmed by the experience. My husband who is not an emotional guy had a hard time with the visits and would be depressed both before and afterwards. I personally chose not to visit my son in prison for various reasons mostly because I had told him over and over when he began down the dark road that lead to that place that if he ended up there I would not visit. I said that I didn't do jail and he needed to learn that I ment it. My husband went about once a month and like I said it was hard on him. Like DDD, we took all the phone calls and we wrote letters. We made sure we kept some money in difficult child's account so he could buy extra food and stamps and stationary to write to us. We sent books on self improvement, faith, and crossword books and novels to keep him occupied. difficult child never faulted us. He was appreciative of all that we did. In truth it was very hard all around but we got through it. I guess what you can gather from all the posts in answer to your question is that you need to take care of yourself first. No matter what you decide to do, it is going to be hard. I for one am very glad I do not have the visual memories of my son in prison to haunt me every Christmas. We are all different in what we want to do and not do. But we all suffer just the same. I think the key is to do whatever causes the least suffering. My husband went two days before Christmas. That gave us the relieve of knowing that difficult child had a visitor and knew that we had him in our thoughts and at the same time gave us time to get over the depression associated with a prison visit. Having time to regroup gave us the ability to enjoy our holiday in spite of the circumstances of our lives. [/QUOTE]
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