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<blockquote data-quote="donna723" data-source="post: 213356" data-attributes="member: 1883"><p>Daisy, I've got my fingers crossed that Nichole sees more of this guy ... or that at least she's around him enough to see the difference in the way he treats her vs. loser boyfriend. I think his father moving in next door was maybe one of those "meant to be' coincidences!</p><p> </p><p>My own daughter was very much like that when she was that age. She didn't have a child but her self esteem was very low. And it wasn't just one guy - she went through a whole parade of dead-end loser boyfriends at that age, some were really the bottom of the barrel. It was like she didn't think she could do any better, that a really good guy wouldn't be interested in her! It seemed almost like the worse they treated her, the more she was clinging to them. After she got her nursing license, she moved back to Florida - long story but things were really bad at our house and getting away from her father did her a world of good. She got a good job and her own apartment and did really well on her own and she began to become much more confident and self assured. She finally got to a point where she got very selective about the guys she dated, and wouldn't go out with someone just to be going out, like a lot of her friends did. She finally thought enough of herself and respected herself enough that she had no time or patience for the losers. That's the frame of mind she was in when she met the wonderful, smart, handsome guy that's now my son-in-law! But if she had met him a few years earlier, she would have hid in a corner because she would never have thought she would have had a chance with someone like him.</p><p> </p><p>And Nichole is dead wrong to think that no one else would be interested in her because she has a child! I wouldn't be surprised if her boyfriend has told her that! Many abusive and controlling men say things like that to women to keep them under their thumb ... "<em>No one else would want you</em>!" My 28 year old son is the ultimate "good guy" - and he loves kids - ALL kids - and he's very good with them! And if someone he was interested in had a child, it wouldn't phase him a bit! In fact, he'd love it! And I think most men feel the same way that he does about it. I think that if a guy was bothered by the fact that she has a child, he's not that much of a bargain and he's not someone she'd want anyway!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="donna723, post: 213356, member: 1883"] Daisy, I've got my fingers crossed that Nichole sees more of this guy ... or that at least she's around him enough to see the difference in the way he treats her vs. loser boyfriend. I think his father moving in next door was maybe one of those "meant to be' coincidences! My own daughter was very much like that when she was that age. She didn't have a child but her self esteem was very low. And it wasn't just one guy - she went through a whole parade of dead-end loser boyfriends at that age, some were really the bottom of the barrel. It was like she didn't think she could do any better, that a really good guy wouldn't be interested in her! It seemed almost like the worse they treated her, the more she was clinging to them. After she got her nursing license, she moved back to Florida - long story but things were really bad at our house and getting away from her father did her a world of good. She got a good job and her own apartment and did really well on her own and she began to become much more confident and self assured. She finally got to a point where she got very selective about the guys she dated, and wouldn't go out with someone just to be going out, like a lot of her friends did. She finally thought enough of herself and respected herself enough that she had no time or patience for the losers. That's the frame of mind she was in when she met the wonderful, smart, handsome guy that's now my son-in-law! But if she had met him a few years earlier, she would have hid in a corner because she would never have thought she would have had a chance with someone like him. And Nichole is dead wrong to think that no one else would be interested in her because she has a child! I wouldn't be surprised if her boyfriend has told her that! Many abusive and controlling men say things like that to women to keep them under their thumb ... "[I]No one else would want you[/I]!" My 28 year old son is the ultimate "good guy" - and he loves kids - ALL kids - and he's very good with them! And if someone he was interested in had a child, it wouldn't phase him a bit! In fact, he'd love it! And I think most men feel the same way that he does about it. I think that if a guy was bothered by the fact that she has a child, he's not that much of a bargain and he's not someone she'd want anyway! [/QUOTE]
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