T
Texasfilly79
Guest
I've posted a few times on this site. I mostly sit back and view the threads to see if there is anything that 1) I can help with or 2) learn from the situation and apply to my step difficult child daughter.
My concerns today is my step son Stevie who is 16 yrs old and does not live with me and husband. Now Stevie is the perfect child when it comes to obeying the rules but I am wondering if that is becuase he has aspergers and not becuase he is a easy child.
Here is the history -
He was diagnosed and cured from Lukemia at the age of 2 (and has a speech impedement due to the chemo) and has lived with Biomom since he parents split when he was 9.
Mom works at night job at the local gas station (Despite having an RN license) and has always given Stevie anything and everything to the point that I feel if he was a regular child, he would be a rotten spoiled little jerk, but he is the exact opposite.
Stevie is really into games, and will bury his head each and every moment he can. BM has spent so much $$ on it that any console you can think about, he has (litterly, he has all three versions of the DS, the Wii, the playstations, the Xbox, the nintendo's, even the first ninetendo that ever came out when I was a kid, he has) and his hands are a permeanently in the shape of holding a game controller, even when holding nothing. I will say he is very good at games, and can detect flaws in the system, that I don't even freaking notice and has been offered a job at Gamestop when he is able to work.
Now, he is very polite and will say yes ma'am no ma'am, and will do anything that is asked. If you "correct" him (ie Stevie, your shoe lace is untied) he will ALWAYS say sorry, no matter what you "correct" him on or even when he walks from his room to the kitchen in front of the TV he will say sorry.
His table manners are atrociaous, but that I belive is more due to the fact that Biomom is not home to help him on his table manners.
Here is what makes me wonder if he does have aspergers, or becuase mom is not home and lets him bury himeself in
When I ask a question, (ie where you going to college; are you going to your school dance; are you going to apply for the job at Gamestop; etc.) the anwser is ALWAYS I don't know.
We asked him where he wanted to go to dinner Sat night and he literally had a panic attack. Constatnly repeating I don't know, and would sit on the couch and hit his head and then bend over and put his head in his lap.
When I asked if there was a particular food he wanted; he said I don't know. I asked him what is your favorite foods; and he said I don't know. When I asked him why he couldn't anwser; he said "There are too many that I can't choose".
This went on for a good 30mins and he never was able to make a choice.
At times, he seems more comfortable to talk to my 9 yr old, then even his sister. But that could be because my 9 yr old has ONE nintendo 3DS.
I have not been around him much; this is probably the 4 or 5th time I have interacted with him. We have asked him to come to the house and visit, but the anwser is always "I don't know". We do call Biomom (and when she does anwser which is every 20th time) and ask to visit with Stevie, her anwser is "I'll ask him; but he will not say yes or no".
He does NOT like talking on the phone, and barely even texts, even to his sister.
I've seen him and his biomom interact once (and that was for only a couple of hours) and it almost seemed like that his mental age he is the age of 9 and not 16.
Is he smart in school, heck yes, but his social interaction is what really really bothers me. He has one friend, and when they are together, there is not a whole lot of interaction, just sit and play video games with each other.
Can you give me your thoughts? Am I over thinking this and how he is reacting to us be becuase he isn't around us a whole lot or is there some underlying issue that Biomom is ignoring that everyone else is picking up on?
My concerns today is my step son Stevie who is 16 yrs old and does not live with me and husband. Now Stevie is the perfect child when it comes to obeying the rules but I am wondering if that is becuase he has aspergers and not becuase he is a easy child.
Here is the history -
He was diagnosed and cured from Lukemia at the age of 2 (and has a speech impedement due to the chemo) and has lived with Biomom since he parents split when he was 9.
Mom works at night job at the local gas station (Despite having an RN license) and has always given Stevie anything and everything to the point that I feel if he was a regular child, he would be a rotten spoiled little jerk, but he is the exact opposite.
Stevie is really into games, and will bury his head each and every moment he can. BM has spent so much $$ on it that any console you can think about, he has (litterly, he has all three versions of the DS, the Wii, the playstations, the Xbox, the nintendo's, even the first ninetendo that ever came out when I was a kid, he has) and his hands are a permeanently in the shape of holding a game controller, even when holding nothing. I will say he is very good at games, and can detect flaws in the system, that I don't even freaking notice and has been offered a job at Gamestop when he is able to work.
Now, he is very polite and will say yes ma'am no ma'am, and will do anything that is asked. If you "correct" him (ie Stevie, your shoe lace is untied) he will ALWAYS say sorry, no matter what you "correct" him on or even when he walks from his room to the kitchen in front of the TV he will say sorry.
His table manners are atrociaous, but that I belive is more due to the fact that Biomom is not home to help him on his table manners.
Here is what makes me wonder if he does have aspergers, or becuase mom is not home and lets him bury himeself in
When I ask a question, (ie where you going to college; are you going to your school dance; are you going to apply for the job at Gamestop; etc.) the anwser is ALWAYS I don't know.
We asked him where he wanted to go to dinner Sat night and he literally had a panic attack. Constatnly repeating I don't know, and would sit on the couch and hit his head and then bend over and put his head in his lap.
When I asked if there was a particular food he wanted; he said I don't know. I asked him what is your favorite foods; and he said I don't know. When I asked him why he couldn't anwser; he said "There are too many that I can't choose".
This went on for a good 30mins and he never was able to make a choice.
At times, he seems more comfortable to talk to my 9 yr old, then even his sister. But that could be because my 9 yr old has ONE nintendo 3DS.
I have not been around him much; this is probably the 4 or 5th time I have interacted with him. We have asked him to come to the house and visit, but the anwser is always "I don't know". We do call Biomom (and when she does anwser which is every 20th time) and ask to visit with Stevie, her anwser is "I'll ask him; but he will not say yes or no".
He does NOT like talking on the phone, and barely even texts, even to his sister.
I've seen him and his biomom interact once (and that was for only a couple of hours) and it almost seemed like that his mental age he is the age of 9 and not 16.
Is he smart in school, heck yes, but his social interaction is what really really bothers me. He has one friend, and when they are together, there is not a whole lot of interaction, just sit and play video games with each other.
Can you give me your thoughts? Am I over thinking this and how he is reacting to us be becuase he isn't around us a whole lot or is there some underlying issue that Biomom is ignoring that everyone else is picking up on?