easy child's girlfriend's reaction to her gifts

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by upallnight, Dec 26, 2011.

  1. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    Ladies, help me bite my tongue. easy child's girlfriend was given about 6 thoughtful gifts from my easy child. A watch, a scarf, a pillow pet that she wanted, 2 boxes of Whitmans chocolates, earphones...totalling $100. She didn't get him anything, on his birthday she didn't get him anything. On her birthday, On Valentines Day, on their "anniversary", he takes her out, buys her a gift and treats her like a queen. Plus, he pays for everything...they go out to eat and to the movies a lot. He worked hard all summer for his money that he uses to go to college, he pays all his expenses and is careful. He doesn't have a lot. But he is generous.

    This girl has a mother who works 2 full time jobs in 2 casinos. She works 7 days a week, 3 16 hour days, 4 8 hour days. Her father gambles for a living, or so she says. He used to work in a casino, but cannot speak English well enough. So whenever easy child goes over there, there is always all kinds of electronic equipment all over that her dad says he "found" in the casino.... she uses a found phone, her laptop and calculator, all "found" My easy child said to her that her dad stole all thos things. Anyway, strange. more later on that.

    So, here is what annoys me. The girlfriend's sister went to a Christmas party and came home with a Coach bag and all kinds of other nice gifts. So the girlfriend went over to her PILE OF GIFTS and put out her bottom lip pouting over her stuff. Her stuff that my easy child gave her!. He is so good to her and she expects the moon from a college kid. This girl never looks me in the eye either. They are not nice to him when he is there and speak chinese and laugh about him. The took him out to dinner once at a chinese buffet, in the middle of the night, her father woke her up and screamed at her about how the mother works hard and they shouldn't have to pay for her boyfriend's restaurant bill. OMG! We took her out so often, and easy child is so good to her. Thanks for letting me vent. I know this isn't my business and have to stay out of it. But....I want to say something so badly. I am sweet as honey to this girl by the way.
  2. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    Sounds like she is using him. I hope he sees the light and finds a new girl soon.
  3. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Sounds like she wasn't raised right. I hope easy child realizes that you can tell a lot about a person from watching their family. Not just how they behave, but their expectations and how they treat others.
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    well the girl does not have a chance.....her dad clearly taught her money is more important than human kindness.
  5. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    That's one of the hardest parts of parenting, in my humble opinion...keeping your mouth shut and a pleasant look on your face. Geez it was so hard when we had six teens at once. One son fell in love with a refugee from Thailand I think. He gave and gave and gave. Thankfully she found a richer guy before long. I could write a book about easy child's getting used as teens..sigh.

    You're choosing the right road. I know how hard it is but that's the only way to protect your bond. I hope "this soon will pass" is applicable. Hugs DDD
  6. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    yeah...DDD is right, dealing with the girlfriend's or boyfriend's of our teens is the hardest part of parenting teens I think. I have wanted to smack some sense into either the girls or my boys...not sure which at times...lol. I want to smack my daughter in law on a regular basis and Mandy isnt much better. I pretty much thank my lucky stars Billy isnt dating full time. LOL.
  7. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    How rude and selfish and self-centered of her!

    I'd have a hard time not dropping hints to him that he deserves better. I hope he sees the light soon!
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I feel so badly for your easy child. Hopefully he will see the light soon and find somebody worthy of his kind heart. She is unable to appreciate it.
  9. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    That is the exact same way my daughter in law acted her first Xmas with Jamie here at my home. He got her all kinds of nice things he thought she would love. Nice pillows for her back and knees because she had been complaining about them, a spa thingy that you fill with water for your feet and turn it on and it heats up when you plug it in and has all these brush attachments, a lovely set of body lotions, a frying pan she had said she wanted.

    She got him one throw blanket with the Carolina Panthers on it and a pair of Panthers sleep pants. That was it. They both came from walmart. Jamie shopped at Bed, Bath and Beyond for everything but the body lotions and the frying pan. The body lotions came from Body works and the frying pan came from Target.

    She threw such a fit and cussed him out right here in my house. She stormed out to her car and got on her cell phone, screaming at him the whole time. He was astounded, embarrassed, and confused. He didnt know what he had done wrong because he was sure she would love what he got her. I thought she would like what he got her. She got more than I had ever got! Evidently it wasnt enough for her spoiled butt! I dont think I got anything that year. Oh...that may have been the year Jamie bought Tony his gun. Probably was. She was probably jealous he spent 300 on his father. She went to her car and threatened to leave Jamie at our house and not take him back to their house. It was a threat that was a real issue because he was still in the Marines and he had to be back on duty the next day. She knew it would be bad. She was always doing stupid stuff like that. Always did and always does.
  10. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I don't know how you've stayed sweet to her all this time. I think I'd have taken her aside by now and told her she's never going to get that Coach bag from him (because if he hasn't noticed by now, he's too smitten to listen to any advice). I'd have stopped being so sweet by now, too. Don't let him confuse your politeness with approval of her.
  11. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    Haozi, I am so done with her! Janet, what is the matter with these girls???? On the plus side, he told my husband he hangs out with other girls up at school. I wrote him a card with JJJ's response on it and he said, "true, very true". She got him NOTHING, let's see what happens next time she wants she wants a snack at my house.
  12. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    It's not all girls, honest :) Some are just not brought up right or maybe they hate their fathers (all males) etc. and feel they deserve more than they do. Hopefully when a young one falls for such a girl, he finds out in time that he deserves to be treated better. Unfortunately, sometimes they marry...but often it is one of life's lessons.
  13. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    I can't believe you held your tongue! You must have the patience and restraint of a saint!

    JMHO...all you need to do now is expose him to a NICE girl somewhere. It can be anybody...a neighbor, somebody from church, whatever....and stop in and see her and bring 'a little something' so your son can see an appreciative reaction...

    and then you gently point out that THAT is how HE should be treated by his girlfriend.
  14. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Way To Go. been there done that. It's better to get biting tongue infections than take a chance on your easy child thinking you are unfair to his loser girlfriend. Maybe you could rinse your mouth with Cutty to cut down on germs?? LOL DDD
  15. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    LOL....I'm having an espesso martini with whipped cream flavored vodka as I type!
  16. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    I don't think we ever have to be quiet when we see anyone mistreated. I esp. dont think so when its our family. Sorry, your boy is not a doormat. I would tell him so and how you felt. He'll have to handle it all because it is his life, but he is only 18. He may or may not listen, but at least you send the message that you think he is a great kid and doesn't deserve what happened. As for the girl-why would you ever have to take her out or invite her over ever again. I would not want her poison in my home. How will she ever learn if she just continues to be so rude and gets away with it?
  17. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    UGH...You know - similar thing happened with us at Cmas with Matt's friend. His Dad is very wealthy, but at the moment shares none of it with M. And M. kind of expected us to be a cash cow or something. It was very uncomfortable, and hurt Matt's feelings a lot.

    I think it is even harder when it is a boyfriend and girlfriend thing. They are a lot more connected than 2 boys that are friends. Who knows what the answer is, except maybe coaching your son on how if his girlfriend is not thankful for a nice dinner for their anniversary, etc., than she is not the one.