I'm maybe just venting a bit. I'm sad, angry today. A while ago I posted about my daughter stealing money from us. I kicked her out that day. She moved into relatively undesirable conditions for about a month until she convinced my (enabling) parents to let her stay there (again, after stealing from them and accusing my dad of molesting her). She said the person she was living with was a horrible, hoarding, heroin addict. But she wanted to move back in with my parents, even though, again, for a good 6 months she had been ascertaining that my father had molested her when she was young. Mind-boggling. My father insisted he did not molest her, she insisted he did. Back to the enabling environment she goes. Again. I urged my parents to set firm boundaries with her. That more of the same was not going to change or help anything. My relationship with them is quite strained. I felt like I was slowly dying, drowning. Could feel myself falling into depression, confusion, sadness, anger. Everything. I could hardly talk to my daughter. Could hardly talk to my father or my mother. All three of them made my heart tug horribly. After a month of me not understanding why any of them would allow the situation (accusations, lies, theft, use etc.), my daughter confessed she was "coked up" when she made the accusations and that it was all a lie. I was relieved, but emotionally exhausted. Still am. She continued to live with them in their weird, twisted triangle. I finally had to tell them the whole situation was too much for me and that, unless they got some sort of help, I was going to need to take a break from my relationship with them. A few days before Thanksgiving, my mom called to tell me that they were missing many items of jewelry and other valuables. That a couple days prior my daughter had printed off something regarding local pawn shops. They didn't know if they should call the police or not. Eventually they decided not to. But they did kick her out. Let me tell you, my holidays were about shot. I think my depression kicked in right about then and refused to lift. She went to stay with her boyfriend. A couple weeks later, his bench warrent caught up with him, he was arrested, and put in jail. She is still staying with his mother. Collecting food stamps. Still not working (well, worked for 3 days, got fired). The Holidays came and went. There's probably SO much more that I don't know. But I'm pretty bottomed out. My parents continue to enable her, picking her up from a friend's house the morning after she spends the night. Taking her to see her boyfriend, counties away, in jail. I don't get it. It goes beyond unconditional love. I can't see it as any way but sending horrible mixed messages, enabling my daughter to continue using, and continue her poisonous patterns of behavior. I'm choked out, basically. I feel like I've lost my daughter and now my mother in one fell swoop. I'm working with a counselor (and did start taking medications to deal with the depression) on "accepting the things I can not change." I so badly want my mom back. But I feel like I lost her. I feel so isolated. This summer my parents will retire and move away. I don't want the time spent to be resentful, elephant-in-the-room, hurt feelings and avoidance. I'm sad that is how it is right now. Thanks for letting me vent. I'm having a hard day today.