buddy
New Member
I wrote in response to the report I received and some school concerns and got this. It's so good to have reasonable responses. Just fun to share with people who understand what a difference a response like this is.
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Hi Dee,
Thank you so, so much for this email and information! I also agree that Q has made huge progress since he was here this summer, and I am REALLY glad that is also being seen at home, and it sounds like at school too.
I was actually really glad when this curriculum was chosen for the group, in part because I do think it will be really good (which also usually goes hand-in-hand with hard) for Q (and some of our other friends, as well) and I really appreciate you letting me know about the teasing/bullying issues and the peer at school, so that I can try to address those with Q more specifically (albeit gently and in a roundabout way throughout the term.
I was pretty sure a lot of the 'wrong answer jokes' Q gave last term (during group discussions)were really a defense mechanism for not knowing the real answer and I think I might have noticed a little bit of a trend throughout the term, as well. When he was wrong and corrected or re-directed by the teacher (Ms. T last term), even gently, Q seemed to be much more likely to continue on with the joke or make more jokes for the other answers. But when he seemed to be really joking or friendly teasing, he would more often 'let it go' after that, even if re-directed or corrected. He also seemed to respond much better to feedback from his peers about when he had taken a joke too far, as the term progressed, and didn't seem to get as defensive if they said something or corrected him (appropriately) towards the end of term. This may all be in my head but I'll be curious to see how this term goes. I also think it's great that he identified that it is okay to joke with me or others in a 1:1 type situation/conversation!
Generally, my response to Q's negative or inappropriate 'attempts' (intentional or unintentional) for attention is to 'ignore' the comment or behavior, pause briefly, and then try to reengage him in something more positive and appropriate, a conversation, activity, or otherwise. This is usually pretty successful, and then, as soon as he's done something positive (or even neutral, like answering a question), I'll ask for a high-five or a hug (etc.) to give him some positive reinforcement (and, as a bonus, sensory input. Granted, we usually only see the overtly negative attempts for attention during the transition back to WM from the outing, which I know is by far the most difficult time for Q (that we see). During class, if I see he's struggling with the material, I try to ask him a question I know (or am at least pretty sure) he knows the answer to and then try to relate it back to the material from there. These are just general strategies, of course, and there is a lot of 'on the spot' tweaking that happens, depending on the situation, etc., so any feedback, ideas, etc. you have are always welcome and greatly appreciated!
Have a good week!
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we really needed this.....
______________________________________________
Hi Dee,
Thank you so, so much for this email and information! I also agree that Q has made huge progress since he was here this summer, and I am REALLY glad that is also being seen at home, and it sounds like at school too.
I was actually really glad when this curriculum was chosen for the group, in part because I do think it will be really good (which also usually goes hand-in-hand with hard) for Q (and some of our other friends, as well) and I really appreciate you letting me know about the teasing/bullying issues and the peer at school, so that I can try to address those with Q more specifically (albeit gently and in a roundabout way throughout the term.I was pretty sure a lot of the 'wrong answer jokes' Q gave last term (during group discussions)were really a defense mechanism for not knowing the real answer and I think I might have noticed a little bit of a trend throughout the term, as well. When he was wrong and corrected or re-directed by the teacher (Ms. T last term), even gently, Q seemed to be much more likely to continue on with the joke or make more jokes for the other answers. But when he seemed to be really joking or friendly teasing, he would more often 'let it go' after that, even if re-directed or corrected. He also seemed to respond much better to feedback from his peers about when he had taken a joke too far, as the term progressed, and didn't seem to get as defensive if they said something or corrected him (appropriately) towards the end of term. This may all be in my head
but I'll be curious to see how this term goes. I also think it's great that he identified that it is okay to joke with me or others in a 1:1 type situation/conversation!Generally, my response to Q's negative or inappropriate 'attempts' (intentional or unintentional) for attention is to 'ignore' the comment or behavior, pause briefly, and then try to reengage him in something more positive and appropriate, a conversation, activity, or otherwise. This is usually pretty successful, and then, as soon as he's done something positive (or even neutral, like answering a question), I'll ask for a high-five or a hug (etc.) to give him some positive reinforcement (and, as a bonus, sensory input
. Granted, we usually only see the overtly negative attempts for attention during the transition back to WM from the outing, which I know is by far the most difficult time for Q (that we see). During class, if I see he's struggling with the material, I try to ask him a question I know (or am at least pretty sure) he knows the answer to and then try to relate it back to the material from there. These are just general strategies, of course, and there is a lot of 'on the spot' tweaking that happens, depending on the situation, etc., so any feedback, ideas, etc. you have are always welcome and greatly appreciated!Have a good week!
______________________________________________________
we really needed this.....
