Emotional Suicide

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Big Bad Kitty, Oct 27, 2008.

  1. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    I finally found something that explains how I feel.


    Emotional Suicide
    Ending Your Life without Killing Yourself
    © L. McBee

    Jun 4, 2007

    Life is meant to be lived and experienced. Emotional traumas can cause some individuals to give up long before the body stops breathing.
    The human spirit is both strong and fragile. The desire to live is instinctive in all of us at birth. It is only through tragic and extreme circumstances that some lose touch with that instinct and choose, instead, to put an end to their existence.

    The latest data available from Suicide.org suggests that more than 30,000 Americans die from suicide each year and more the 750,000 suicides are attempted. However, statistics are not readily available concerning the number of Americans who stop living their lives long before they die. Unable to cope with the emotional demands of fully participating in life, these individuals forego the pleasures of usefulness, joy, life experiences and virtually all activity not directly linked to sustaining their existence.

    This version of suicide can lead to self-destructive behaviors ranging from physical deterioration due to lack of activity to extreme drug or alcohol abuse. These individuals often decline invitations to participate in family gatherings, holidays, and other outings. Frequently, they will alienate themselves from their family, friends and other associates; some becoming almost agoraphobic.

    The onset of such an emotionally tragic state of mind can often result from the sudden loss of something extremely and profoundly important to the individual. Whether it is the loss of a loved one, a career, or physical health, these losses can be overwhelming and debilitating. If the individual is unable to refocus their purpose and energies toward something that provides them with a new and meaningful purpose, depression and a loss of self can easily become dominating forces in a once, well-lived life.

    Depression is not only a leading cause of emotional suicide, but the behavior itself will, in turn, intensify the depression. Left untreated, this cycle can become debilitating to the point of having virtually the same consequences of physical suicide, up to and including eventual, early death.

    Those who care for an individual suffering from this condition are greatly affected. According to information from FamilyAware.org, family members and friends may experience extreme feelings of guilt and hopelessness. Unawareness of what they can do to help, combined with insistence from the sufferer that he or she wants to be left alone, leave many confused as to whether or not to intervene at all and unaware of the options that are available.

    Should you or someone you know find yourself in this situation, understand that help is available and necessary. Regardless of what someone suffering from this may believe or try to convince others, it is neither normal nor healthy to limit one's life existence to only those activities necessary to continue breathing. Purpose and the pursuit of accomplishment and contentment are vital components of life. Although emotional suicide does not result in the sudden and unexpected loss of life that traditional suicide causes, it indeed creates a slower version of the same tragedy for both the sufferer and those who love him or her.
  2. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    It appears that you have gone into a fairly deep depression. You should probably reach out for some help...either a good therapist or perhaps a psychiatrist and get some medications to help you through this. Don't let it get worse.....the holidays are coming and typically depression becomes much worse during those times. Get a grip on this before it consumes you.
  3. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member


    I've been thinking about you lately - I miss "seeing" you here. When I read this, it just made me so very sad... I agree with Lothlorien- Please get some help!!!

    You are a strong person, BBK. You can get through this!!! We'll be here to support you all the way.

    Please take the first step and make an appointment to see a doctor. Don't let yourself feel this way any longer than you have to.

    I want you to know that I'm keeping you in my thoughts... Hugs... WFEN
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I've been wondering how you're doing...please make some calls and get an appointment. You can get through this.

    I'll keep you in my thoughts.
  5. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Ohhhh, Miss Kitty! Go talk to a psychiatrist! You need a break - you've had so much on your plate that you're driving yourself to the brink!

    We're here for you...please let me know if there's anything I can do to help you feel better! I remember the pics of Tink that you put up and how happy and proud you were! Go and look around in the older posts and reread the fun stuff that was going on!

    Missed you!

  6. ScentofCedar

    ScentofCedar New Member

    Oh, honey....

    I've heard these times in our lives likened to deserts. Believe that you will make it through the desert, that you will survive the stick-dry time.

    Know that we are all pulling for you, praying for you; that we are holding white candles at the forest's edge that will show you your way home.

  7. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    It's very easy to wake up one day and find yourself having quietly slid into this state of mind. been there done that.

    I'm glad you are seeing it for what it is. Now you just need to do the right thing for yourself and go see someone who you know can help. I think many, many of us here go through this more than a few times in our lives. I know I have.

    Sending you gi-normously warm hugs and a gentle nudge to pick up the phone to make that appointment today.
  8. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    BBK, before you do something you will regret like fall off the wagon, please get help. Do it for Tink. Do it for us. Do it for whoever or whatever, but do it. I wish you could see to do it for yourself, but it is likely you can not see your value at this time.

    Please, do the right thing.
  9. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    BBK, I been wondering where you've been hiding. I miss your bubbling board personality.

    Please get some help. I miss you being around.
  10. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Well....now you know HOW you feel, what do YOU propose to do with the information?

    I think it's good that you have been searching for a WHAT or a HOW - about your emotions - that in itself is phenominal despite the depression.

    Realizing you have a problem (blah blah blah) but you do - so I ask you now as a friend
    WHEN are you going to do something?
    HOW can I help?
    WHAT can I do to support you?

    Hugs & Love
  11. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Thanks, friends. I miss you all too. A lot.

    Lately I've been feeling like I don't have much to contribute to my board friendships so I've kept to myself. I come here every day but I don't say anything.

    I think that the holidays are a lot of it. I don't know. I just feel depleted. I feel completely empty and useless.

    I see a therapist with Tink every other Wed. I will tell her about this when I see her this week.

    Love you all a lot.
  12. house of cards

    house of cards New Member

    I hope you can reach out and maybe get some medication to get through this..you don't have to go through this hurt, reach out.
  13. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    BBK, Sending big strong hugs, a shoulder to lean on and strong arms to carry you through this.

    I'm glad that you will be talking things over with the therapist at your next appointment. Be very gentle with yourself, and do what you have to do to get through this. We love you.

  14. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    BBK, you really need to do more than mention this. You really need to make an appointment for yourself to discuss this with therapist before and without Tink around. Call in the morning and make an appointment.....please.
  15. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Kitty..........I have felt like this almost every single day for the last year. And off and on, my whole life.

    In the last 7 years, I have often realized that I am committing emotional suicide, but have never been able to articulate it as well as this article. We live, and exist, and yet deep within our core, we do not really want to.

    This article also described Matt - he was so deeply agoraphobic for months - and then acted on the physical intent to take his life. I wish I had realized that his agoraphobia was his own soul-ish suicide.

    I will not tell you "to get help", cuz I know you will. But it is more than getting help. It is a deep, tidal wave of life change that has to happen. And I know, at least for me, it is more than I can fathom at times. I do believe, however, that it will happen. For both of us.

    And please post no matter how you are feeling. You always have amazing things to contribute.
  16. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I've missed you. You are such an amazing person. I hope you will listen to the others and seek the help you need (nothing wrong with needing that help). Sending prayers and hugs your way. We love you!
  17. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    Sadly, I couldn't get the link to open but I just wanted to chime in that you're missed and cared about tremendously here. There is never a day that I don't think bout you and wondering how you're doing.

    I wish I was closer so you could get a break. I hope the therapist can help you somewhat. Just remember that we're here and someone is nearly always awake if you need to talk.

  18. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    {{{Miss Kitty}}}

    I hope you will get the help you need to get through this. That article sounded so much like my father that it was scary. Please get treatment before Tink is hurt by this too. I know it may be hard to make it happen just for you but remember you are Tink's world. {{{Hugs}}}
  19. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    BBK I hope you reach out to the therapist. She ought to be able to direct you someone who can help.

    Depression is h*ll. Only way I know how to put it. Know that we love you and we care. And most definately we're here always.

    Miss you.

  20. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    BBK -

    I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. Do what you need to do to take care of you.

    I think some of it is probably the time of year, too, and not enough sunlight - SAD. Try getting out in the sun a little everyday.

    Emotional suicide - reminds me of the Garth Brooks song, "Standing Outside the Fire".

    We're all here for you.