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The Watercooler
Empathy. Can it be taught to somebody that doesn't already have it?
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 599520" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I have probably whined and complained on here about Tony enough lately that people who havent been here long probably think he is awful. He isnt. Trust me on this one, if he acted like what yours is acting, he would be gone. Of course, we have been together 30 years now and issues come up from time to time that need to be worked through and right now we are in one of those periods.</p><p></p><p>No one should have to live with someone who is a leach who wont even pretend to try to be nice. He wont go get the groceries....I would go inside and grab him by the ear and drag him to the car to make him get them. My rule here is if I buy them someone else has to bring them in. If I get home and there isnt anyone home, I bring in the stuff that has to go in the freezer/fridge and leave the rest. Someone else will get the rest. I am not capable of doing it all. </p><p></p><p>You work hard, you are also a single parent. That is two full time jobs. He is lazy. I dont know what his job is but if he makes that low a wage it cant be much. I cant imagine why he can only pay that amount of money in rent unless he is on disability. If he is, tell him to go get public housing. If he is able to work, then stop being lazy and work. Of course that isnt your problem. He isnt going to change. He is too old to change. No one changes at 50. It doesnt matter what his parents did or didnt do for him. Tony's parents gave him almost nothing for xmas...oranges, a 2 liter drink and the boys all shared some sort of ball. Believe me my boys didnt suffer the same fate and we were poor. </p><p></p><p>I am very disabled and Tony brings we my dinner plate almost every nite even after I have made the meal because he knows cooking has taken everything out of me. I have to go sit down. Tony and I do have our arguments over how much he thinks I can do but in the end we are still here. We dont do a whole lot of gifts to each other but believe you me, there is absolutely no doubt the love. Ask people here who have met us.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 599520, member: 1514"] I have probably whined and complained on here about Tony enough lately that people who havent been here long probably think he is awful. He isnt. Trust me on this one, if he acted like what yours is acting, he would be gone. Of course, we have been together 30 years now and issues come up from time to time that need to be worked through and right now we are in one of those periods. No one should have to live with someone who is a leach who wont even pretend to try to be nice. He wont go get the groceries....I would go inside and grab him by the ear and drag him to the car to make him get them. My rule here is if I buy them someone else has to bring them in. If I get home and there isnt anyone home, I bring in the stuff that has to go in the freezer/fridge and leave the rest. Someone else will get the rest. I am not capable of doing it all. You work hard, you are also a single parent. That is two full time jobs. He is lazy. I dont know what his job is but if he makes that low a wage it cant be much. I cant imagine why he can only pay that amount of money in rent unless he is on disability. If he is, tell him to go get public housing. If he is able to work, then stop being lazy and work. Of course that isnt your problem. He isnt going to change. He is too old to change. No one changes at 50. It doesnt matter what his parents did or didnt do for him. Tony's parents gave him almost nothing for xmas...oranges, a 2 liter drink and the boys all shared some sort of ball. Believe me my boys didnt suffer the same fate and we were poor. I am very disabled and Tony brings we my dinner plate almost every nite even after I have made the meal because he knows cooking has taken everything out of me. I have to go sit down. Tony and I do have our arguments over how much he thinks I can do but in the end we are still here. We dont do a whole lot of gifts to each other but believe you me, there is absolutely no doubt the love. Ask people here who have met us. [/QUOTE]
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Empathy. Can it be taught to somebody that doesn't already have it?
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