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Everything Turned Upside Down
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<blockquote data-quote="AnnieO" data-source="post: 471137" data-attributes="member: 6705"><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/hugs.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":hugs:" title="hugs :hugs:" data-shortname=":hugs:" /></p><p></p><p>Welcome!</p><p></p><p>You do need to have him evaluated. Honestly, one of the things I have worked on with Jett is... "I love <strong>you</strong>, and I know you're a smart/good kid, you just made a bad choice. Happens to us all." (He was convinced he was stupid for a long time... LDs will do that when un-diagnosis'd.)</p><p></p><p>I also have worked on my reactions. When he was first diagnosis'd ADHD, I denied, denied, denied. I'm still not convinced, but I'm willing to believe it's possible. (This board has worked wonders on ME!) But... The behaviors point elsewhere. I think maybe <strong>I</strong> know too much about Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) now!</p><p></p><p>It's not so much that he "forgets everything he's been told". It's probably more likely that he remembers, but he's stuck, and having problems acting out what he knows to be right. Jett likes to say he "forgot" chores or homework, when the fact is, he has been thinking about video games for hours, so they're more important to him than the boring stuff. He remembers the stuff, it's just not top on his priority list! And for your son - getting those supplies out of the closet is <em>the </em>priority.</p><p></p><p>NOW - he could, in fact, be ADHD. There's behavioral management, and medication. I look at the medications this way - if they improve focus enough that the child can learn the coping mechanisms, then they're great. If no coping mechanisms are learned, not so much. (I used to be TOTALLY anti-medications...)</p><p></p><p>And one thing I have learned... Kids especially, but people in general, do not hear "don't"... So when you say, "<em>Don't</em> touch the stove," they hear: "<em>Touch </em>the stove". 5 minutes later, while holding their hand under cold water, you ask, "Didn't I just tell you NOT to touch the stove?" and they cry and are confused. We had to totally reword stuff. "Don't spill your milk" became "Let's move your cup away from the edge of the table".</p><p></p><p>Just a thought...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AnnieO, post: 471137, member: 6705"] :hugs: Welcome! You do need to have him evaluated. Honestly, one of the things I have worked on with Jett is... "I love [B]you[/B], and I know you're a smart/good kid, you just made a bad choice. Happens to us all." (He was convinced he was stupid for a long time... LDs will do that when un-diagnosis'd.) I also have worked on my reactions. When he was first diagnosis'd ADHD, I denied, denied, denied. I'm still not convinced, but I'm willing to believe it's possible. (This board has worked wonders on ME!) But... The behaviors point elsewhere. I think maybe [B]I[/B] know too much about Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) now! It's not so much that he "forgets everything he's been told". It's probably more likely that he remembers, but he's stuck, and having problems acting out what he knows to be right. Jett likes to say he "forgot" chores or homework, when the fact is, he has been thinking about video games for hours, so they're more important to him than the boring stuff. He remembers the stuff, it's just not top on his priority list! And for your son - getting those supplies out of the closet is [I]the [/I]priority. NOW - he could, in fact, be ADHD. There's behavioral management, and medication. I look at the medications this way - if they improve focus enough that the child can learn the coping mechanisms, then they're great. If no coping mechanisms are learned, not so much. (I used to be TOTALLY anti-medications...) And one thing I have learned... Kids especially, but people in general, do not hear "don't"... So when you say, "[I]Don't[/I] touch the stove," they hear: "[I]Touch [/I]the stove". 5 minutes later, while holding their hand under cold water, you ask, "Didn't I just tell you NOT to touch the stove?" and they cry and are confused. We had to totally reword stuff. "Don't spill your milk" became "Let's move your cup away from the edge of the table". Just a thought... [/QUOTE]
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