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General Parenting
Experienced moms: What would you do? (Long)
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 44427" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Wow! I came home and look at all the input! Thanks so much! I think the hardest part is that P.'s mom said, "Well, if you feel that way about my daughter...I don't see how we can be friends." I really was trying to work out a way to let them stay friends, and I even said Nicole may be responsible for some things (maybe she is, but I have a *had* a "stinker" kid, and I sure knew it--nobody had to tell me--and Nicole is a nice girl). I'm going to restrict her time with P. to school and softball (my hub and her father coach together--nice, huh? <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" />) I already told her that she is not allowed to trash P. to the other kids or be mean to her, just ignore her if she's mean, and play with her other friends. Nicole not hanging around with P. anymore has already affected S. in a positive way (I think), and S. is going to the school counselor to tell him that P. has been hitting her (P., for some reason, likes to slap S. around. She won't hit Nicole because Nicole is strong. </p><p>Nicole understands kids with disorders from kids who seem to be mean for no reason. She is the biggest champion of a very bright boy with Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified in her grade. P. calls him "bad" and Nicole always sticks up for him, chooses him for a partner, asks him to her party, etc. Nicole's brother has Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified and she goes ballistic if anyone makes fun of either her brother or her classmate. I'm told she's very kind to this child, even though he isn't always in the mood to be friendly. He does like her and always waves to her and smiles when he sees her. She also has a friend who was born with cancer (very sad, but the kid is full of spirit). P's mom is always telling me how mean this girl with cancer is, and the child CAN be mean, but P's mom cuts this little girl NO slack for maybe not feeling well or being on medication. The child has no hair-she was born that way-and when S. was with P. she told her "nobody likes you because you look so gross. No boy will ever go out with you." The child's mother heard it. So S. can be very cruel too when she is with P. Parents have reported to me that Nicole is NOT like this, even with P., but why push it? If I thought P. had a disorder or a bad home life--well, I tend to give kids the benefit of the doubt, and if parents work with me, I will try to include that child. But P. is an honor's student with a family who loves her and four nice siblings. She's good in sports. I feel like I have no choice but to keep Nicole away from her--thanks for the support. </p><p>I feel much better now. (((Hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 44427, member: 1550"] Wow! I came home and look at all the input! Thanks so much! I think the hardest part is that P.'s mom said, "Well, if you feel that way about my daughter...I don't see how we can be friends." I really was trying to work out a way to let them stay friends, and I even said Nicole may be responsible for some things (maybe she is, but I have a *had* a "stinker" kid, and I sure knew it--nobody had to tell me--and Nicole is a nice girl). I'm going to restrict her time with P. to school and softball (my hub and her father coach together--nice, huh? :)) I already told her that she is not allowed to trash P. to the other kids or be mean to her, just ignore her if she's mean, and play with her other friends. Nicole not hanging around with P. anymore has already affected S. in a positive way (I think), and S. is going to the school counselor to tell him that P. has been hitting her (P., for some reason, likes to slap S. around. She won't hit Nicole because Nicole is strong. Nicole understands kids with disorders from kids who seem to be mean for no reason. She is the biggest champion of a very bright boy with Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified in her grade. P. calls him "bad" and Nicole always sticks up for him, chooses him for a partner, asks him to her party, etc. Nicole's brother has Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified and she goes ballistic if anyone makes fun of either her brother or her classmate. I'm told she's very kind to this child, even though he isn't always in the mood to be friendly. He does like her and always waves to her and smiles when he sees her. She also has a friend who was born with cancer (very sad, but the kid is full of spirit). P's mom is always telling me how mean this girl with cancer is, and the child CAN be mean, but P's mom cuts this little girl NO slack for maybe not feeling well or being on medication. The child has no hair-she was born that way-and when S. was with P. she told her "nobody likes you because you look so gross. No boy will ever go out with you." The child's mother heard it. So S. can be very cruel too when she is with P. Parents have reported to me that Nicole is NOT like this, even with P., but why push it? If I thought P. had a disorder or a bad home life--well, I tend to give kids the benefit of the doubt, and if parents work with me, I will try to include that child. But P. is an honor's student with a family who loves her and four nice siblings. She's good in sports. I feel like I have no choice but to keep Nicole away from her--thanks for the support. I feel much better now. (((Hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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