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General Parenting
explaining lack of playdates
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<blockquote data-quote="pepperidge" data-source="post: 405064" data-attributes="member: 2322"><p>We have so been there. And still are with difficult child 2. We end up doing a lot of driving to pick up kids etc to try to have playdates. It was always so hard when my kids wanted to have playdates with kids I knew were not going to be allowed to come, or the kids didn't want to come. Sometimes you can find one or two other kids with some social skills deficits and try to arrange stuff, or kids whose parents work and would welcome a playdate.</p><p></p><p>One thing that we have done is to try to get him in a lot of organized activities so at least he was with other children. Meant a lot of time of parent involvement since we had to be there to try to help things go well. </p><p></p><p>Can you get any help from school counselor, social skills groups etc? We are struggling with much the same situation--it isn't so much that my son doesn't have the social skills, it is the problem of impulse control. As in he knows what to do, but doesn't always do it. As he gets older and others mature faster, the isolation seems to be growing. So I am not helping you at all. lol.</p><p></p><p>At this point if you think that the behaviors are beyond your son's control, I would try to make some excuses--so and so is busy after school or whatever. I would be gentle and try to find positives when you see him playing well with others. These kids already have some sense of rejection.</p><p></p><p>While I resisted medication for a long time to some extent it has helped some of the ADHD stuff. So something else to ultimately think about. </p><p></p><p>It is a heatbreaker. When my son was 11 he had to fill out a form for the doctor. One question is who his friends were --he wrote, "my dog."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="pepperidge, post: 405064, member: 2322"] We have so been there. And still are with difficult child 2. We end up doing a lot of driving to pick up kids etc to try to have playdates. It was always so hard when my kids wanted to have playdates with kids I knew were not going to be allowed to come, or the kids didn't want to come. Sometimes you can find one or two other kids with some social skills deficits and try to arrange stuff, or kids whose parents work and would welcome a playdate. One thing that we have done is to try to get him in a lot of organized activities so at least he was with other children. Meant a lot of time of parent involvement since we had to be there to try to help things go well. Can you get any help from school counselor, social skills groups etc? We are struggling with much the same situation--it isn't so much that my son doesn't have the social skills, it is the problem of impulse control. As in he knows what to do, but doesn't always do it. As he gets older and others mature faster, the isolation seems to be growing. So I am not helping you at all. lol. At this point if you think that the behaviors are beyond your son's control, I would try to make some excuses--so and so is busy after school or whatever. I would be gentle and try to find positives when you see him playing well with others. These kids already have some sense of rejection. While I resisted medication for a long time to some extent it has helped some of the ADHD stuff. So something else to ultimately think about. It is a heatbreaker. When my son was 11 he had to fill out a form for the doctor. One question is who his friends were --he wrote, "my dog." [/QUOTE]
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