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General Parenting
Explaining Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) to the Typical World - Guilt Trip
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<blockquote data-quote="WearyWoman" data-source="post: 383962"><p><strong>Update #2:</strong> Well, a letter arrived in the mail today addressed to husband from the education coordinator at church. She apologized for not trusting his explanation, stating that she was wrong and should have been glad that he was home to tell her we wouldn't be coming. This was a surprise, and my hubby just smiled over it. He thinks she's just young and inexperienced and made a mistake. He moved on almost right away after the phone call. At least she had the sense to apologize.</p><p> </p><p>Marg - I appreciate your response and stories of your own experiences. As you said, this happens in a variety of settings, not just church. You know, my mom (retired now), a former elementary school teacher, often tells me that she sees things so differently now that she has a grandson with these special needs. For example, I told her how much sensory overload Bubby's classroom invites, with every inch of wall space covered in bright pictures, words, art, supplies, and other things. Clutter and noise are everywhere, and there is very little serenity to be found for a child whose senses get easily overwhelmed. My mom said she never realized how some kids could be affected this way. So, it's all about education and experience. I've learned so much myself. I can't blame others too much, as I wouldn't be clued in either were it not for my own kids. Although, I would like to see educators more up to speed on this, since it is their occupation.</p><p> </p><p>Fran - I am only just beginning to get to the point where I don't feel the need to answer to others with the decisions I make for me and my family. I am a person with a people-pleasing disease, I think - LOL. So, it's hard to overcome the feelings of obligation and the consequential guilt for putting our needs first. I am working on this about myself. I do like the idea of finding a way to reach out to other kids and families in a similar situation. Clearly, churches and schools could use a group of folks who get it with these special kids. I have been humbled so many times by my experiences raising a child with an autism spectrum disorder. Sometimes people tell me that Bubby is so lucky to have us for parents, but I always tell them that we're the lucky ones. And I mean that. Life is much richer this way.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WearyWoman, post: 383962"] [B]Update #2:[/B] Well, a letter arrived in the mail today addressed to husband from the education coordinator at church. She apologized for not trusting his explanation, stating that she was wrong and should have been glad that he was home to tell her we wouldn't be coming. This was a surprise, and my hubby just smiled over it. He thinks she's just young and inexperienced and made a mistake. He moved on almost right away after the phone call. At least she had the sense to apologize. Marg - I appreciate your response and stories of your own experiences. As you said, this happens in a variety of settings, not just church. You know, my mom (retired now), a former elementary school teacher, often tells me that she sees things so differently now that she has a grandson with these special needs. For example, I told her how much sensory overload Bubby's classroom invites, with every inch of wall space covered in bright pictures, words, art, supplies, and other things. Clutter and noise are everywhere, and there is very little serenity to be found for a child whose senses get easily overwhelmed. My mom said she never realized how some kids could be affected this way. So, it's all about education and experience. I've learned so much myself. I can't blame others too much, as I wouldn't be clued in either were it not for my own kids. Although, I would like to see educators more up to speed on this, since it is their occupation. Fran - I am only just beginning to get to the point where I don't feel the need to answer to others with the decisions I make for me and my family. I am a person with a people-pleasing disease, I think - LOL. So, it's hard to overcome the feelings of obligation and the consequential guilt for putting our needs first. I am working on this about myself. I do like the idea of finding a way to reach out to other kids and families in a similar situation. Clearly, churches and schools could use a group of folks who get it with these special kids. I have been humbled so many times by my experiences raising a child with an autism spectrum disorder. Sometimes people tell me that Bubby is so lucky to have us for parents, but I always tell them that we're the lucky ones. And I mean that. Life is much richer this way. [/QUOTE]
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