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Family meal.....
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 691757" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>UKM, I think situations like these are infuriating but also bring more clarity to what we will and won't tolerate. Another step toward a stronger boundary. </p><p></p><p>Having him with you with a group for an evening. Sharing a cocktail and then dinner. If that doesn't go well, it gives us further affirmation for even stricter boundaries.</p><p></p><p>At one point I told Difficult Child to call me once a week within a one hour period of time and if he called at any other time for any reason I would not pick up the phone. His behavior was so outrageous that we had to get to that point. </p><p></p><p>I think that is perfectly okay and it clearly spells out that we are done with unacceptable behavior. You act like that, fine, but we don't be present to be a part of it. I remember it was very hard at first to stick to it especially as he tried to manipulate me into responding but it got easier as I was able to experience the peace of him not being in my life for a few days at a time without all of his dysfunctional behavior. </p><p></p><p>They show us where they are at a particular point in time with their behavior. They can change and some do over time which gives us hope. But til then, take care of YOU.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 691757, member: 17542"] UKM, I think situations like these are infuriating but also bring more clarity to what we will and won't tolerate. Another step toward a stronger boundary. Having him with you with a group for an evening. Sharing a cocktail and then dinner. If that doesn't go well, it gives us further affirmation for even stricter boundaries. At one point I told Difficult Child to call me once a week within a one hour period of time and if he called at any other time for any reason I would not pick up the phone. His behavior was so outrageous that we had to get to that point. I think that is perfectly okay and it clearly spells out that we are done with unacceptable behavior. You act like that, fine, but we don't be present to be a part of it. I remember it was very hard at first to stick to it especially as he tried to manipulate me into responding but it got easier as I was able to experience the peace of him not being in my life for a few days at a time without all of his dysfunctional behavior. They show us where they are at a particular point in time with their behavior. They can change and some do over time which gives us hope. But til then, take care of YOU. [/QUOTE]
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