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Family of Origin
Family of Origin (FOO) Support Thread Part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 663611" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Hi SWOT. I never thought he worshiped me. That was the comment of that hotel owner betrayer that took in my son after I threw him out. Giving him refuge for years, and letting him do anything. Without giving anything in return.</p><p></p><p>I never saw any indication of worship. I would have found it repugnant.</p><p></p><p>All I wanted was to raise a healthy boy and healthy male. I am searching my soul to find where it all went wrong. Turning my heart inside out. I more than anybody knows that worship is not what we strive for.</p><p></p><p>I do believe he loved me at one time. That is all I know.</p><p></p><p>It is just that I search my mind over and over again to try to figure this out. So that I can have peace and understand how to deal with my son.</p><p></p><p>I am coming to believe that all of this soul searching and laying it all out by eviserating myself is a mistake. It is what it is. I was not a bad mother. I am a normal person. I did not do what your Mother did. My son is not like your brother.</p><p>This is absolutely true. While he adored M before we became involved, my son told me, that he had pain. "It has always been just us, Mom." But by that time he was already being hostile and resistant with me, and I knew the solution was not in my continued devotion. It had to come from something else. Independence. Achievement. Something. But not Love.</p><p>He has a best friend, which is where he wants to go. He wants to move back in with the friend and the friend's father. The son is an unlicensed landscape concrete contractor. His English is poor. My son speaks fluent Portuguese and is a help to him in the communications side.</p><p></p><p>My son has had lots of acquaintances but this is his only true, best friend.</p><p></p><p>SWOT, I know you are trying to help me. I did not set out to get my son's worship. I just loved him. At one time, he loved me.</p><p></p><p>I am just very, very lost and sad in all of this. And trying to find my footing and then my way.</p><p></p><p>Thank you.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 663611, member: 18958"] Hi SWOT. I never thought he worshiped me. That was the comment of that hotel owner betrayer that took in my son after I threw him out. Giving him refuge for years, and letting him do anything. Without giving anything in return. I never saw any indication of worship. I would have found it repugnant. All I wanted was to raise a healthy boy and healthy male. I am searching my soul to find where it all went wrong. Turning my heart inside out. I more than anybody knows that worship is not what we strive for. I do believe he loved me at one time. That is all I know. It is just that I search my mind over and over again to try to figure this out. So that I can have peace and understand how to deal with my son. I am coming to believe that all of this soul searching and laying it all out by eviserating myself is a mistake. It is what it is. I was not a bad mother. I am a normal person. I did not do what your Mother did. My son is not like your brother. This is absolutely true. While he adored M before we became involved, my son told me, that he had pain. "It has always been just us, Mom." But by that time he was already being hostile and resistant with me, and I knew the solution was not in my continued devotion. It had to come from something else. Independence. Achievement. Something. But not Love. He has a best friend, which is where he wants to go. He wants to move back in with the friend and the friend's father. The son is an unlicensed landscape concrete contractor. His English is poor. My son speaks fluent Portuguese and is a help to him in the communications side. My son has had lots of acquaintances but this is his only true, best friend. SWOT, I know you are trying to help me. I did not set out to get my son's worship. I just loved him. At one time, he loved me. I am just very, very lost and sad in all of this. And trying to find my footing and then my way. Thank you. COPA [/QUOTE]
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Family of Origin (FOO) Support Thread Part 2
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