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Feedback - Residential Treatment/Therapeutic Boarding Schools
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 335325" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Hi Dad - I think the only thing I would add is that there are no guarantees with- an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). I would gently caution against going into this with a fixed time frame in your mind of how long his stay would be. I would also caution against expecting a miraculous turn around when he does come home. A very wise woman on this board said many years ago that if you place a difficult child in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC), you are still going to be getting a difficult child home - hopefully a kid who can function more appropriately and who has better coping skills and tools to use, but a difficult child nonetheless.</p><p> </p><p>You sound like you have researched this step extensively. At the end of the day, my advice to any parent is to follow your gut. You know your child best and you know what he is capable of, both good and bad. We can only make the very best possible choice that we are able to.</p><p> </p><p>I can't answer your poll question. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> Obviously, with- my son in 4 placements and out of our home a full half of his childhood, at some point we decided Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was a viable option. And the good ones were very very good. So far, the outcome has been less than stellar but there are a lot of variables in there, most of them having to do with my son's noncompliance and distorted thought processes. I'm in a state of reflection right now about woulda/shoulda/coulda's in terms of the choices we made with him. Logically, our hands were tied. The level of violence he perpetrated not only on myself and our home, but most importantly on his siblings, really made Residential Treatment Center (RTC) unavoidable. But... I'm still reflecting on it. Hopefully someday I'll be able to make some sense out of it all. </p><p> </p><p>A therapist told us when my son was 8 that he wouldn't change his behaviors until it became too expensive for him to continue them. It made sense - still does. What none of us expected was his capacity for misery and his dogged insistence that he would do things his way, that rules didn't/don't apply to him. </p><p> </p><p>So I guess I'm saying, absolutely, do what you think is best for you son, what has the most potential to help him learn to make better choices, teach him strategies so he can learn to function with and accommodate his mood disorder so that he can lead as successful a life as he chooses, but also know that there are no guarantees.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 335325, member: 8"] Hi Dad - I think the only thing I would add is that there are no guarantees with- an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). I would gently caution against going into this with a fixed time frame in your mind of how long his stay would be. I would also caution against expecting a miraculous turn around when he does come home. A very wise woman on this board said many years ago that if you place a difficult child in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC), you are still going to be getting a difficult child home - hopefully a kid who can function more appropriately and who has better coping skills and tools to use, but a difficult child nonetheless. You sound like you have researched this step extensively. At the end of the day, my advice to any parent is to follow your gut. You know your child best and you know what he is capable of, both good and bad. We can only make the very best possible choice that we are able to. I can't answer your poll question. ;) Obviously, with- my son in 4 placements and out of our home a full half of his childhood, at some point we decided Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was a viable option. And the good ones were very very good. So far, the outcome has been less than stellar but there are a lot of variables in there, most of them having to do with my son's noncompliance and distorted thought processes. I'm in a state of reflection right now about woulda/shoulda/coulda's in terms of the choices we made with him. Logically, our hands were tied. The level of violence he perpetrated not only on myself and our home, but most importantly on his siblings, really made Residential Treatment Center (RTC) unavoidable. But... I'm still reflecting on it. Hopefully someday I'll be able to make some sense out of it all. A therapist told us when my son was 8 that he wouldn't change his behaviors until it became too expensive for him to continue them. It made sense - still does. What none of us expected was his capacity for misery and his dogged insistence that he would do things his way, that rules didn't/don't apply to him. So I guess I'm saying, absolutely, do what you think is best for you son, what has the most potential to help him learn to make better choices, teach him strategies so he can learn to function with and accommodate his mood disorder so that he can lead as successful a life as he chooses, but also know that there are no guarantees. [/QUOTE]
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