Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
feeling anxious
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="donna723" data-source="post: 116172" data-attributes="member: 1883"><p>Susan, I second (and third) everything everyone else has said! He will tell you anything you want to hear to persuade you to try to get him out! Many of these prison ministry volunteers are very experienced and knowledgeable. If this man feels that that he is growing and maturing from the jail experience, he probably is. At this point, the less interference from you, the better.</p><p></p><p>Now for the other ... is this a large municiple jail or a small county jail? Each has their own rules but some things are universal in them all. I have worked for the Dept. of Correction in a Close Security prison for more than 21 years and know a bit about some of this. Each has a "formulary" of drugs that are allowed to be used for the inmates. Xanax may or may not be allowed. But any drugs that have a "street value" are very closely regulated, given one by one, and they try to verify that it has been swallowed. Sometimes they are dissolved in water before they are given to them. But still, some are able to "cheek" them and resell them to other inmates. And they DON'T CARE that it's been in someone elses mouth (or worse!) before they get it! Xanax would bring quite a bit of money or commissary in a jail or prison. I'm not saying that this is what would happen, but it's a fact.</p><p></p><p>And on the phone calls ... cell phones are pretty much strictly forbidden in any jail or prison, for inmates <em>and</em> staff, if that's what he's using. Maybe the facility he's in is not as vigilant as we are about it, but I could be fired on the spot if I attempted to bring my cell phone in to the facility, even for my own use. And if I brought it in for an inmate to use, I not only would be fired, I'd probably be prosecuted! Since cell phones have gotten small enough to conceal in "body cavities", they are being smuggled in by inmates families and friends (and a few unscrupulous staff members looking for a fast buck). Cell phones have become the new hot item of contraband because they allow them to get around the phone call recording and monitoring system. They have been used by inmates to arrange drug deals or even to harass victims or family members. So if he's calling you on a cell phone, it's NOT OK and he's more than likely breaking a jail rule and will be in trouble if he gets caught. </p><p></p><p>All that being said, I DO know how you feel. I know how hard it is to detach ... when you've spent their whole life looking out for them, it's a very hard habit to break, but you simply have to. It's all up to him now. He's a grown man. Just remember to take what he tells you with a grain of salt. And I second what someone else said about getting some help for yourself to deal with the stress you are going through. When you yourself are stronger, it will be easier to deal with what you're contending with. Sending lots of (((hugs))).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="donna723, post: 116172, member: 1883"] Susan, I second (and third) everything everyone else has said! He will tell you anything you want to hear to persuade you to try to get him out! Many of these prison ministry volunteers are very experienced and knowledgeable. If this man feels that that he is growing and maturing from the jail experience, he probably is. At this point, the less interference from you, the better. Now for the other ... is this a large municiple jail or a small county jail? Each has their own rules but some things are universal in them all. I have worked for the Dept. of Correction in a Close Security prison for more than 21 years and know a bit about some of this. Each has a "formulary" of drugs that are allowed to be used for the inmates. Xanax may or may not be allowed. But any drugs that have a "street value" are very closely regulated, given one by one, and they try to verify that it has been swallowed. Sometimes they are dissolved in water before they are given to them. But still, some are able to "cheek" them and resell them to other inmates. And they DON'T CARE that it's been in someone elses mouth (or worse!) before they get it! Xanax would bring quite a bit of money or commissary in a jail or prison. I'm not saying that this is what would happen, but it's a fact. And on the phone calls ... cell phones are pretty much strictly forbidden in any jail or prison, for inmates [i]and[/i] staff, if that's what he's using. Maybe the facility he's in is not as vigilant as we are about it, but I could be fired on the spot if I attempted to bring my cell phone in to the facility, even for my own use. And if I brought it in for an inmate to use, I not only would be fired, I'd probably be prosecuted! Since cell phones have gotten small enough to conceal in "body cavities", they are being smuggled in by inmates families and friends (and a few unscrupulous staff members looking for a fast buck). Cell phones have become the new hot item of contraband because they allow them to get around the phone call recording and monitoring system. They have been used by inmates to arrange drug deals or even to harass victims or family members. So if he's calling you on a cell phone, it's NOT OK and he's more than likely breaking a jail rule and will be in trouble if he gets caught. All that being said, I DO know how you feel. I know how hard it is to detach ... when you've spent their whole life looking out for them, it's a very hard habit to break, but you simply have to. It's all up to him now. He's a grown man. Just remember to take what he tells you with a grain of salt. And I second what someone else said about getting some help for yourself to deal with the stress you are going through. When you yourself are stronger, it will be easier to deal with what you're contending with. Sending lots of (((hugs))). [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
feeling anxious
Top