Feeling Frustrated This Morning

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Bunny, Feb 14, 2013.

  1. Bunny

    Bunny Active Member

    It's not that difficult child has been behaving really badly lately. I think that the little things are getting to me and I'm just tired of it. I'm tired of feeling like I have no control in my own home. I'm tired of feeling like I'm not safe here with difficult child when he gets angry. I'm tired of finding holes in doors and him saying, "Well, I didn't do it! Why do you always blame me?" Really, the innocent act was over for me years ago. Basically, I think that I'm tired of always having to be "on" and feeling like I always have to listen when difficult child and easy child are playing together so that difficult child doesn't hurt easy child when he turns on him.
  2. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    I hear that!

    Unfortunately, I never found a good solution. My daughter is 17 and I am STILL on guard 24/7/365...
  3. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    ((Hugs)) I am so sorry you are feeling so burned out. I am sure having them home and "trapped" in the house for those days did not help. Anyway you can get away for the weekend to recharge? I know hotels can be so $$ but could you go to a friends or family's house for a day or 2? And let husband handle it for a day? Hope you are feeling better later today.
  4. TeDo

    TeDo CD Hall of Fame

    I agree with Stressed. You NEED a break after being cooped up with them. You need a day or two to regenerate. It doesn't have to be anything big or expensive, just some QUALITY me time with someone else being "on". I know how exhausting it can be. Now that things are better, I can relax a little but I'm still "on" and listening and my mind is always "planning" just in case. Hopefully you can find some peace and relaxation somewhere somehow!!


    Bunny - I'm feeling the exact same way. I don't even think we know how stressful this way of living is. Sometimes I think it's easier for an outsider to see it. Hang in there.
  6. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I hear you.....and get it. I agree, even when things are not the worst, our level of being hyper-aware and always on guard never gets to let up. I swear it's hogging brain cells I could use for better things!
  7. Bunny

    Bunny Active Member

    Thanks, everyone. I appreciate it. I was supposed to run away from home last weekend, but then we got slammed with a blizzard. I'm thinking about doing it this Saturday instead. I just need a break. From everyone.
  8. buddy

    buddy New Member

    YES! You do that!
  9. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Absolutely!!!I am supposed to run away from home one or two days a month. That's only happened twice in the past 3 yrs. Sigh.

    Good luck!
  10. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Terry, what happened to that apartment of yours, the one that you would be able to "run away" to?
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Bunny, you should get some time away from the kids for at least a few hours a week. husband should take them with him somewhere for at least 6 hours straight and give you some down time. Its not asking a lot for a father to parent his kids at least on the weekends if he works during the week. It sort of falls under the job description. It doesnt have to cost money. They can go out and learn about nature by taking walks in the woods and learning to identify what they see. They can take long walks on the ocean and get a hot dog. Or pack a picnic. All sorts of things for father's and sons to do. My boys were fishing with their dad from the time they could be dragged onto a pier in a bassinet. Then they tromped around in the woods with him to hunt squirrels. It wasnt so much what they were doing, it was time with their father. The boys were little toddlers and running up and down piers as itty bitty ones and people were convinced they were going to fall off but they were so used to being there that it was a second home.
  12. paperplate

    paperplate New Member

    Same here :( There's never a day off! I'm convinced I have ptsd! Hope u get some kind of break soon. Even if it's just an hour in the tub.
  13. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Paperplate... it's not PTSD.
    There is no "trigger" event... just the on-going day-to-day challenges (tame word, that!) of raising a major difficult child.

    What warrior moms end up with is usually called "caregiver burnout".
    (I'm no better than anybody else on this front...)
  14. Bunny

    Bunny Active Member

    Thanks, everyone. I actually managed to run away from home for a few hours yesterday. I picked up one of my friends and we went to the needlework shop for a few hours. It was a lovely way to spend the morning/afternoon. I didn't even go to easy child's hockey game, and I always go to their sports things. He was disappointed that I wasn't going, but I explained to him in a way that I think he understood. I told him that he goes to play with his friends and this was mom's turn to go and play with her friends.
  15. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Yay! I'm so glad you got out for a while.
    And needlework is so nice and peaceful.

    I'm sorry for easy child but it sounds like he understood. You've just got to get time for yourself. I love the explanation!

    Insane, I don't have the apt yet. Sigh. It's been one thing after another. Soon ...