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Feeling Low about the Future
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 281487" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>One thing that my difficult child was struggling with two years ago when he started falling apart was the future. He became so afraid because he did not know how he would be able to get a job and support a family. He was looking at the skills and talents he had as a 10 year old and giving up on an adult life because he could not handle it. </p><p> </p><p>I told him of course you can not handle those responsibilities yet. You have not been given the knowledge or tools on how to do that. It takes time to gain what you need.</p><p> </p><p>I told him that he did not have to worry about what life will be like as an adult. He would be given tools as he grew and if does his best in school he will learn what he needs to. Then he stated he was afraid of college being so hard. </p><p> </p><p>I tried to explain to him that he will be prepared as he reaches college. Of course he is unable to make it work as a 10 year old. There are so many things for him to learn and understand and that takes time.</p><p> </p><p>I think for your difficult child like all kids, it will depend on how he tackles the challenges in his life. How well will he use the tools given to him as he grows. Much of him being able to be independent will rest on his attitude toward living independently. It is too early for him to start looking toward living alone and facing life's challenges.</p><p> </p><p>Continue to give your difficult child all the opportunities that you can for him to experience life. Encourage him to be a smart thinker in facing problems. He is still learning and the next 4 -5 years may just build the foundation he needs to want to take on the responsibilities it takes to gain the priviledges of living independently.</p><p> </p><p>You may keep that doubt in your mind and prepare for it however, allow yourself to continue to work toward your son's independent. You will know his heart and determination better than the doctor does. The saying is, "Prepare for the worst but expect the best."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 281487, member: 5096"] One thing that my difficult child was struggling with two years ago when he started falling apart was the future. He became so afraid because he did not know how he would be able to get a job and support a family. He was looking at the skills and talents he had as a 10 year old and giving up on an adult life because he could not handle it. I told him of course you can not handle those responsibilities yet. You have not been given the knowledge or tools on how to do that. It takes time to gain what you need. I told him that he did not have to worry about what life will be like as an adult. He would be given tools as he grew and if does his best in school he will learn what he needs to. Then he stated he was afraid of college being so hard. I tried to explain to him that he will be prepared as he reaches college. Of course he is unable to make it work as a 10 year old. There are so many things for him to learn and understand and that takes time. I think for your difficult child like all kids, it will depend on how he tackles the challenges in his life. How well will he use the tools given to him as he grows. Much of him being able to be independent will rest on his attitude toward living independently. It is too early for him to start looking toward living alone and facing life's challenges. Continue to give your difficult child all the opportunities that you can for him to experience life. Encourage him to be a smart thinker in facing problems. He is still learning and the next 4 -5 years may just build the foundation he needs to want to take on the responsibilities it takes to gain the priviledges of living independently. You may keep that doubt in your mind and prepare for it however, allow yourself to continue to work toward your son's independent. You will know his heart and determination better than the doctor does. The saying is, "Prepare for the worst but expect the best." [/QUOTE]
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