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Feelings about adoption etc.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 536075" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>There is nothing like this in our country. Frankly, I wish their would be. </p><p></p><p>I am totally serious about forced sterilization after two drugged affected babies. So are a lot of people who adopt out of foster care. In our adoptive parent group, it came up often and, interestingly enough, it was pretty much thought of as a good (but impossible to implement) solution from people who were both extremely conservative, extremely liberal and everywhere in between. It is hard to see a child you love struggle so much when it didn't have to be. Even harder is knowing that biomom is out there still having damaged children. </p><p></p><p>All of us realized sterealization woujld never happen. We would sometimes talk about other impossible solutions, such as being jailed or confined and monitored while pregnant if you had more than one damaged/drug affected child. These parents, however, had adopted only from foster care. We were unique in that we had adopted many ways. </p><p></p><p>I do think the birthparents (and their genetics) are important in the equation and do not believe all adopted children are troubled. I really think Jumper is more well-adjusted than most teenagers. I don't know how she came to be this way, but she did. But I think she has a lot of her birthmother's temperment and her birthmother was very level-headed and very determined to do the right thing. She was not your typical spacy, drug abusing, high school drop out birthmother. She really did want her daughter to go to a home where she would be loved and accepted, and her family would not accept a partly black child. I have talked to Birthmom and her family never brings Jumper up at all. It's like she is a dirty secret. And the birthfather was in jail for drugs. I give him kudos. He allowed her to be adopted. </p><p></p><p>PastryChef is a sweet person too and I'm glad we adopted her, even with her early drug issues. </p><p></p><p>I would adopt again if younger, but I'd try to be careful about the age of the child and I'd probably want to meet the birthparents. I would not adopt another child who was from a different country. I got lucky with PastryChef, but Scott never felt he fit in. Maybe that's because he came at age six...I would never ever ever consider a child any older than a few months old. been there done that...no thanks.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 536075, member: 1550"] There is nothing like this in our country. Frankly, I wish their would be. I am totally serious about forced sterilization after two drugged affected babies. So are a lot of people who adopt out of foster care. In our adoptive parent group, it came up often and, interestingly enough, it was pretty much thought of as a good (but impossible to implement) solution from people who were both extremely conservative, extremely liberal and everywhere in between. It is hard to see a child you love struggle so much when it didn't have to be. Even harder is knowing that biomom is out there still having damaged children. All of us realized sterealization woujld never happen. We would sometimes talk about other impossible solutions, such as being jailed or confined and monitored while pregnant if you had more than one damaged/drug affected child. These parents, however, had adopted only from foster care. We were unique in that we had adopted many ways. I do think the birthparents (and their genetics) are important in the equation and do not believe all adopted children are troubled. I really think Jumper is more well-adjusted than most teenagers. I don't know how she came to be this way, but she did. But I think she has a lot of her birthmother's temperment and her birthmother was very level-headed and very determined to do the right thing. She was not your typical spacy, drug abusing, high school drop out birthmother. She really did want her daughter to go to a home where she would be loved and accepted, and her family would not accept a partly black child. I have talked to Birthmom and her family never brings Jumper up at all. It's like she is a dirty secret. And the birthfather was in jail for drugs. I give him kudos. He allowed her to be adopted. PastryChef is a sweet person too and I'm glad we adopted her, even with her early drug issues. I would adopt again if younger, but I'd try to be careful about the age of the child and I'd probably want to meet the birthparents. I would not adopt another child who was from a different country. I got lucky with PastryChef, but Scott never felt he fit in. Maybe that's because he came at age six...I would never ever ever consider a child any older than a few months old. been there done that...no thanks. [/QUOTE]
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