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General Parenting
Feelings & Thoughts because of difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="busywend" data-source="post: 192495" data-attributes="member: 391"><p>Deni, all your feelings are typical when you are being abused by your own child. A spouse is one thing, but you can get away from a spouse. There is a real dilemma when it is your own child. You can not just run from them and find a sleepy little town in the middle of nowhere to hide. </p><p> </p><p>It is very difficult to be abused by one's child. Not many people even accept that it is possible. They figure the parent is the one that calls the shots so how could they be abused? Well, they have never parented a difficult child. </p><p> </p><p>You are in the fight for your son's life and here he is turning on you, the one person helping him. Am I right? I know, you have had these thoughts, too. It is not natural and the human body/mind does not know how to process it. There is no ingrained instinct in parenting this way. </p><p> </p><p>One thing I know for sure, if you are not healthy you can not help anyone else. So, let difficult child do his thing for now. Do whatever it takes to make sure you and your mother are safe (locks on doors, video cameras, etc.) and work on getting you healthy. Heck, your mom probably needs to focus on herself a bit, too. She is not as deep into the tunnel as you, but she still is in darkness. </p><p> </p><p>So, think about what it is that you need and get the help you feel would be best for you. If you lose your job, there will be another one someday. Your priority must be you. I used up 6 weeks of vacation that I had built up during my dark year. Thank goodness I had it, but I know not everyone does. I really did need that time away though to heal.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="busywend, post: 192495, member: 391"] Deni, all your feelings are typical when you are being abused by your own child. A spouse is one thing, but you can get away from a spouse. There is a real dilemma when it is your own child. You can not just run from them and find a sleepy little town in the middle of nowhere to hide. It is very difficult to be abused by one's child. Not many people even accept that it is possible. They figure the parent is the one that calls the shots so how could they be abused? Well, they have never parented a difficult child. You are in the fight for your son's life and here he is turning on you, the one person helping him. Am I right? I know, you have had these thoughts, too. It is not natural and the human body/mind does not know how to process it. There is no ingrained instinct in parenting this way. One thing I know for sure, if you are not healthy you can not help anyone else. So, let difficult child do his thing for now. Do whatever it takes to make sure you and your mother are safe (locks on doors, video cameras, etc.) and work on getting you healthy. Heck, your mom probably needs to focus on herself a bit, too. She is not as deep into the tunnel as you, but she still is in darkness. So, think about what it is that you need and get the help you feel would be best for you. If you lose your job, there will be another one someday. Your priority must be you. I used up 6 weeks of vacation that I had built up during my dark year. Thank goodness I had it, but I know not everyone does. I really did need that time away though to heal. [/QUOTE]
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