Finally cleared the air with easy child and girlfriend...I hope

flutterby

Fly away!
There have been continued issues with easy child and girlfriend - over money, over difficult child and difficult child 2, among other things.

Today was the last straw for me. easy child had my debit card. Again. He always seems to forget to give it back to me. He was out, so I called him and asked him to pick something up for me since he had my card. He wasn't happy how I was spending the money. You know, MY money. I told him it didn't matter what he thought.

When he got home, I let him know that I don't answer to him. And that I'm tired of repeatedly having this conversation. Then I told him that I didn't think this living situation was working out. That I'm not going to tiptoe around and deal with this everyday. Not in MY home.

The money issue. He thinks if he pays rent then he gets to tell me how I can or cannot spend it. I told him to try living on $300 a month anywhere else. He kept going and I repeated that I really didn't think this living situation was going to work out. That I'm not doing this over and over and over. Besides the fact that they have paid nothing for October, but went shopping all day today.

He and girlfriend have issues with difficult child; about what they think she should and shouldn't be doing. I told them they don't get to tell me how to parent. I reminded them that she is 14 and easy child did the same things at that age. easy child said that we don't know if she's going to change. I told him that I didn't know if he would either. He said that's why I should have addressed it. I told him when he has raised kids he can talk to me about it. He said he doesn't want to wait that long. I told him that I've been parenting her and she's come a long way, so I'm obviously doing something right. And reminded him that it's not his place. He's not the parent, he's the sibling. All his actions are doing is creating resentment for difficult child and if he has issues with difficult child he needs to let me know so I can address them. I reminded him how well it worked when I raised hell and tried so hard to get him through school and how I was told I was being a B for my trouble.

In the end, it seemed the air had been cleared. An understanding met. Hopefully, they understand their place in the pecking order.

But, this is the last time I'm having the conversation. If it has to happen again, they have to find somewhere else to live. And that's all there is to it.
 
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