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Parent Emeritus
Finding peace even though she tries to steal it..
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 339348"><p>I'm so sorry.</p><p>I am not there...but understand in a major way.</p><p>Our adult child is also adopted and has "special" needs...termed difficult child here.</p><p>She is on disability and this makes things easier in away. We can afford to put a roof over her head. She has worked in the past, she takes her medication and for the great majority of the time, she is repsectful to us.</p><p>If she is disrespectful to husband or I, we pull back in a major way.</p><p>Our help to her is greatly limited and we have, for the most part, detached.</p><p>IT is still hard though...saw her this morning and it was a tough tug on my heart.</p><p>We started detaching a little when she turned 18. At 21, it was pretty much in full force.</p><p>Do not concern yourselves with- what others think.</p><p>You might if you are able, offer medical and psychological care for your child/children. Are both of them out of the home? Are both of them having problems?</p><p> Let her (them?) know that this will always be available to her and that you will do your best to provide this for her.</p><p>You might give her the appropriate numbers for food stamps.</p><p>But, especially if she is rude to you, not willing to help herself, causes chaos repeatedly for you....I would not do much, if anything more than that (Offer to pay for medical services and give her the number for foods stamps/other social services).</p><p>Consider googling <strong>Families Anonymous, Alan Anon</strong> or NAMI and see if any of these groups would be appropriate for you and attend a mtg. </p><p>Be sure to take some time for yourself. </p><p>Wishing you well...hang in there!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 339348"] I'm so sorry. I am not there...but understand in a major way. Our adult child is also adopted and has "special" needs...termed difficult child here. She is on disability and this makes things easier in away. We can afford to put a roof over her head. She has worked in the past, she takes her medication and for the great majority of the time, she is repsectful to us. If she is disrespectful to husband or I, we pull back in a major way. Our help to her is greatly limited and we have, for the most part, detached. IT is still hard though...saw her this morning and it was a tough tug on my heart. We started detaching a little when she turned 18. At 21, it was pretty much in full force. Do not concern yourselves with- what others think. You might if you are able, offer medical and psychological care for your child/children. Are both of them out of the home? Are both of them having problems? Let her (them?) know that this will always be available to her and that you will do your best to provide this for her. You might give her the appropriate numbers for food stamps. But, especially if she is rude to you, not willing to help herself, causes chaos repeatedly for you....I would not do much, if anything more than that (Offer to pay for medical services and give her the number for foods stamps/other social services). Consider googling [B]Families Anonymous, Alan Anon[/B] or NAMI and see if any of these groups would be appropriate for you and attend a mtg. Be sure to take some time for yourself. Wishing you well...hang in there! [/QUOTE]
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Finding peace even though she tries to steal it..
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