First time posting, new to this, arrrgh

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Big Bad Kitty, Apr 12, 2007.

  1. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Hi everyone,

    My daughter (6) was just diagnosed TODAY with ADHD, ODD, and Sensory Integration Disorder (SID). Up until today there was a question as to whether or not she had Asperger's Syndrome.
    This kid just wears me out. By the time she is awake a half hour, I need a nap.
    Anyways, it was a Godsend that I found this support site. I was googling ODD for some more information on the disorder when I ran across this site. I feel not quite so alone anymore. I am sure some of you must know what I mean...the feeling of being judged when your difficult child decides to throw a tantrum int he middle of a store, and EVERYBODY in the store looks at you like you are the worst mother in the world...
    difficult child's doctor is sending her to an Occupational Therapist (OT) and prescribed her Metadate. Anyone have any experience with that drug?

    Prayers (um, what are those funky beads called? I don;t remember) to all the warrior moms & dads out there)
     
  2. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Lisa,
    Welcome! I'm glad you found us-you are definitely not alone! You will find much support here. Many of us have been in that store being judged by others-as I said you are not alone-you won't be judged here.

    My son was on Metadate for awhile. It did help his ADHD but brought about too much raging due to his bipolar. In fact, for our difficult child, because of his bipolar, we can't use any stimulants.

    Again welcome!
     
  3. Alisonlg

    Alisonlg New Member

    Welcome!!!

    Totally know what you mean about those glaring eyes from strangers judging you as the worst parent on earth!

    You've found a great group of moms and dads here, so glad you found us! :smile:
     
  4. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Welcome. We have no experience with Metadate, but I can tell you about being judged by others, simply because you or your kids are a bit different. Now it's weird again - difficult child 3 has become a walking encyclopedia and thesaurus, but without the pronunciation guide - he often mispronounces words because he's learnt them by reading them, not hearing them. In general he makes people smile because he is so carefully formal.

    difficult child 1 walks around the mall, on the other hand, with his expressionless Aspie face looking almost like a scowl. With his long black coat, his HUGE boots with metal plats all the way up the shins and buckles everywhere, we have friends who say they're scared to approach him because he looks so confronting. He now helps girlfriend teach Sunday School and it did take some time for the little kids to realise that you can't judge a book by its cover.

    People have judged our kids for years, since they were tiny. People were critical of difficult child 1's hyperactivity and extreme neediness, telling us to not coddle him so much. One bloke at church got angry with him simply because he (difficult child 1) was being a bit noisy, outside, after church and was the older bloke was about to spank him when a good friend of mine intervened. The old bloke was a control freak with no sons, only daughters who have been brought up to recognise Daddy as the ultimate authority. Instead, in our house, parenting is a partnership with mutual respect.

    Your child has a mixed bag of diagnoses and you say they've ruled out Asperger's. Just a caution for you - they ruled out Asperger's in difficult child 1, when he was 6. Instead he was given an ADHD diagnosis which never quite explained everything. So keep an open mind. Frankly, the diagnosis is there mainly to help you access services such as IEP in school, other official things. But for day to day management and therapy - you are guided by what your child is going through, and what you feel needs attention. The label here is far less important. For example, difficult child 3 has a diagnosis of autism, but his main presenting problem at the moment is anxiety. In the past, other problems have been more urgent (such as his late language development) and with the anxiety increasingly controlled, we're now looking more at his problems with coordination and fine motor control. And the whole time - we're working to keep that amazing brain of his stimulated and working productively. He has a target career choice and we're constantly working towards it.

    Welcome and good luck. Keep us posted on how you go.

    Marg
     
  5. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Welcome!!!!!!

    Glad you were able to find us on The Day. My son was prescribed Metadate when he was first diagnosis'd in kindy but he had really bad rebound. Please remember that all our kids respond differently to the same medications.

    I hope your daughter's diagnosis and start of medication is the beginning of a positive change in your lives. Will she be attending any therapy?

    Again, welcome to the board!

    Sharon
     
  6. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Hi & welcome. I'm glad that you were able to find us. The majority of the parents here have been where you are now & have rec'd support & information to help us with our journey with a difficult child.

    Take what you can use - what applies to your child; leave the rest.

    Again welcome.
     
  7. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    WOW.

    I am just overwhelmed. I finally feel like I am not alone! I am amazed at the resolve I have seen in some of your stories. You're not kidding, warriors.

    Thank you all for the warm welcome. Yay, I'm home!
     
  8. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Welcome aboard. May I suggest that you keep a little journal now
    your daughter is being trailed on her first medication. It does
    not have to be detailed but it will make it easier to remember
    how she reacted. Often one medication is tried and then another has to
    be trailed before you get the right combo. The first couple of
    days "can" result in symptoms, like sleepiness, that passes.
    Also as someone posted there can be rebound issues...behaviors
    that are not desireable as the medication leaves the system.

    Good luck. Glad to have you join us. DDD
     
  9. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Welcome to the board. :biggrin:

    Oh, just wanted to say don't totally disregard the aspergers just yet. Your daughter is only 6. It may be that at this age her symptoms don't present enough for a diagnosis as yet.

    With T, he got worse as he got older. Well, not really. But it seemed that way because the other children were passing him by and he was staying the same. He just couldn't keep up.

    I'd just tuck it in the back of your mind for now and stay watchful for the future.

    Hugs
     
  10. 'Chelle

    'Chelle Active Member

    Hi Lisa :smile:

    I remember when I first found this site, a big sense of relief that there were others who understood what we were going through. A little sadness too, that other parents had to go through what we do, some even moreso. Other parents had holes in their walls and were called freaks (or something similar LOL) it wasn't just me. How about the joy of a kicking yelling difficult child on the floor of the aisle in WalMart, and just keeping on walking because you know he'll get up and follow, and feeling horrible about almost wishing he wouldn't because then everyone will know he's with you. :redface: I do NOT remember these as good times LOL.

    As dreamer said, your difficult child is only 6 so at this point leave options open and don't rule things out completely if there's still suspicions in your mind. We didn't get a diagnosis for our difficult child until he was 10, but I realized that his therapist was using therapies and strategies for the symptoms he had whether he had the label or not.

    Again, welcome to a wonderful site. Hope you find what you need with us, whether just listening while you vent or the advice of parents who've also been there done that.
    :flower: :angel: :kisses:
     
  11. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I wouldn't disregard Aspergers either. It's too early. In fact, Aspergers is often diagnosed in adults who are smart, yet having a hard time in life. I'd like to chip in that bipolar is VERY hereditary. I'm surprised they didn't want to trial bipolar medications before stimulants because, if he has childhood BiPolar (BP), stims can kick it up a notch. Did a Psychiatrist diagnose your child? I'd be leery of stims for this kid, considering the family history. ODD is almost never a stand alone diagnosis and often ODD kids do really well on BiPolar (BP) medications--ODD is a big part of BiPolar (BP). Welcome!
     
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