fit after fit after fit after fit

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by amazeofgrace, Aug 28, 2008.

  1. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    so I go back to work this morning after a 5 day vacation at the beach and 4 hours later my Dad calls me demanding I "get home now and deal with my kid". He was watching difficult child II for me and difficult child II was here playing the wii with 2 of his friends, my Dad was in the adjoining laundry room and one of difficult child II's friends being "funny" slammed the door shut on him, well, needless to say my Dad did not think it was funny, he came out screaming, calling them all names and threw them out of the house, all while difficult child II was losing it on him, for losing it on him and his friends. Hence forth the phone call, summoning me home.

    I come home and collect difficult child II from around the corner, confiscate his bike, or at least try to, while he's ripping it out of my hands. I get him inside he is calling me every name in the book, my Dad comes out screaming, and difficult child II proceeds to call my Dad Hitler and some colorful obscenitites. Yep, mayhem. I call SW, she's not there, I call mobile, they won't come and tell me to call SW. SW calls, difficult child II hangs up on her, she calls back, offers psychobabble and suggests giving difficult child II space. But I am beyond "space" at this point, I'm repeatedly being called a F'n B over and over, I tell him if he does not stop he will get soap in his mouth, he doesn't stop, I smear soap across his mouth.

    For the past 7 hours I have been riding this emotional rollercoaster with difficult child II, he is angry, he is sorry, he is crying, he asks for the wii back (I took that too), I say no, he gets angry, he blames his behavior on missing S2BX, he is crying, he is angry, etc etc etc He is highly irritable and explosive, and it was definatley a day were I could've taken him for a psychiatric evaluation, but again, why bother? They only send him home, or to a hospital, that then, sends him home, a vicious useless cycle!

    sorry venting, I am on my 3rd bottle of coke, fully leaded:faint:
  2. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Vent away. I'm sorry, it's sounds like a horrible day. I know when difficult child is repeatedly swearing at me I often need to walk away because it is the only thing that helps difficult child to eventually calm down (that is unless he's in his follow me no matter where I go swearing tangent).

    I truly hope tomorrow is a better day. Gentle hugs.
  3. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    that is unless he's in his follow me no matter where I go swearing tangent

    yep that has been him today, and when he's sorry and weepy, he needs to be on top of me, and to be "comforted" which can be hard when you're emotionally exhausted from being abused.
  4. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    I am so sorry. Sending you strength for tomorrow.
  5. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Sending hugs and lots of extra strength to get through tomorrow.
  6. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Wow. So sorry.
    Is he not on any medication? Sounds like he's WAY out of control and needs them to control himself. Does he have a psychiatrist?
  7. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I hope that both you and gfgII have a better day today. I hate to say this, but it sounds like your dad may not be the one to watch gfgII. I realize that you probably didn't have a choice here, but it sounds to me like this particular escalation had a lot to do with dad's reaction to one of gfgII's friends - not directly related to an action by gfgII.

    I do agree with the sw who said difficult child needed his space. I have learned with my difficult child that I do have to stop talking, stop threatening, etc., because he is not hearing me. He's hearing what we heard on the old Charlie Brown specials when an adult spoke, "wa waa waa wa". The sound of my voice talking to him is like nails on a blackboard for me. He needs to just be quiet and then he is able to calm himself. At that point consequences can be given - I don't ever give punishments or consequences in the midst of an outburst - it's really counter productive. I do understand though, that many difficult children will spiral, even though they are "fine" at the time, when given consequences for a previous action.

    I hope things are calmer for all of you today.

  8. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    well my Mum was on babysitting duty today, and difficult child II did surprisingly well. He still has not apologized to my Dad. Now we just have to get through to holiday weekend. His in home is coming Monday at 10am despite the holiday, I have a feeling it will be good she's coming!
  9. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I am glad that today was better. I am glad in-home will be there Monday morning. Stay strong this weekend - let us know how it goes.
  10. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    difficult child II is on 15 of abilify and .15 of clonodine daily (broken into 3 doses)

    He's been seeing a psychiatrist since he was 8 (quite a few actually)

    He's also been in hospital twice and to partial hospital twice and is in a contained BD class in our public school.

    Lithium is inevitable and I am thinking we will try it when we got to see the Dr on 9/3. I know S2BX would object, but being he's been out of the picture for over a year, there's not much he can say about it, lord knows he should be on it too!
  11. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Whew! What a scene.
    So sorry.
    Glad it improved the next day, though.
    I wouldn't say anything to S2BX unless you have to.
    Stay strong.