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florida update
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<blockquote data-quote="TheWalrus" data-source="post: 685820" data-attributes="member: 19905"><p>Your daughter sounds exactly like mine. I have not spoken to my daughter since her arrest and, like you, I don't want to. When I do, she will do the same - I didn't call HER, I didn't support HER, I haven't been a good mom to HER. </p><p></p><p>I've learned this is emotional blackmail and a way for her to avoid taking responsibility for her choices and consequences. She doesn't want to hear what I would have to say about whatever her latest drama is, so she doesn't call (because she doesn't REALLY want to hear from me) while acting offended because I don't call her. Works out really well for her, actually.</p><p></p><p>At one time, I was like you and would tear myself up, because I immediately threw myself into guilt mode: I should call her, but I don't want to call her, and if I don't call her she will feel neglected, but if I do it will turn ugly, so what do I do? Then I would feel so guilty because what kind of mother doesn't want to speak to her child?</p><p></p><p>She is an adult. She left. She came back. If she wants to speak to you, she knows how to get in touch with you. The responsibility doesn't fall on you to reach out to her. Anymore than it falls on me to reach out to mine.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TheWalrus, post: 685820, member: 19905"] Your daughter sounds exactly like mine. I have not spoken to my daughter since her arrest and, like you, I don't want to. When I do, she will do the same - I didn't call HER, I didn't support HER, I haven't been a good mom to HER. I've learned this is emotional blackmail and a way for her to avoid taking responsibility for her choices and consequences. She doesn't want to hear what I would have to say about whatever her latest drama is, so she doesn't call (because she doesn't REALLY want to hear from me) while acting offended because I don't call her. Works out really well for her, actually. At one time, I was like you and would tear myself up, because I immediately threw myself into guilt mode: I should call her, but I don't want to call her, and if I don't call her she will feel neglected, but if I do it will turn ugly, so what do I do? Then I would feel so guilty because what kind of mother doesn't want to speak to her child? She is an adult. She left. She came back. If she wants to speak to you, she knows how to get in touch with you. The responsibility doesn't fall on you to reach out to her. Anymore than it falls on me to reach out to mine. [/QUOTE]
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