For those of you that dont know the whole story...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Cass1, Mar 24, 2007.

  1. Cass1

    Cass1 New Member

    I will fill you in on why CAS has difficult child's baby in fostercare.
    difficult child's girlfriend has a little girl that is 2 and a half in May 06 she was at her grandmas for the night while she was there she fell down the stairs and sustained a head injury.The grandma put ice on it but did not take her to the hospital after returning her home to difficult child and his girlfriend she told them what happened and said she appeared to be fine.Her left eye had started to swell so the next day I went over and picked up difficult child's girlfriend and her little girl and took them to the Dr's he said if she got worse over night to rush her to the hospital.She slept through the night and girlfriend went to the store in the morning while she was gone the little girl started to fuss so difficult child went in the bedroom to get her when he went to pick her up she started to have a seizure so he called me right away ,he was scared.I rushed over and this poor little girl could hardly see out both eyes now as they had both totally swollen up.girlfriend and I rushed her to the hospital they admitted her with head trauma.
    So because she was admitted with a head injury police and CAS questioned everyone and CAS went over old records of problems I had with difficult child when he was younger.The grandma told them she fell down the stairs and hit the cemment floor.When talking to difficult child about how he looks after her he told them the truth nothing to bad he also told them about how he played with her by bouncing her on the mattress.He told them when he bounced her on the mattress the week before she bumped the back of her head so he didnt do it no more and that was 4 days before she went to her grandmas.Her injury was all to the left side of her head and behind her left eye.After they questioned everyone and looked over CAS files again they arrested difficult child and charged him with aggravated assault and took the daughter away. :mad:
    It has been a nightmare for our entire family and totally not fair.Just because I had issues with difficult child when he was younger doesnt mean he's going to hurt a little child he never hurt any of his sibblings or my friends kids he babysat.He's actually really good with kids.
    So as for the new baby when he was born not even an hour after he was born (I must add difficult child was great with girlfriend while delivering )CAS walked in told difficult child he had to leave and they were apprehending the baby.difficult child was so emotional about this that he went in the bathroom and was throwing up and almost colapsed.
    We had figured in the beginning that CAS would problem cause a problem for them so the plan was that the baby would stay with me til difficult child got done with court and until difficult child and girlfriend got stuff straightened out with CAS.But no doesnt matter that Im family they came right in and took him :sad:
    So now I have to go through all this stuff with CAS to see if they will allow him to come stay with us.difficult child has trial on Apr 2nd for this charge.
    This is why I dont post as often also, because Ive been so busy trying to help difficult child and girlfriend through this we have so many different appointment its hard to keep up.
    Cassie :angel:
  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member


    Im so sorry all this is happening to you guys. Accidents do happen to babies. We recently had something happen with Keyana where she came home from daycare and couldnt move her arm. Actually what happened was she came home extremely fussy but sometime during the night she started not being able to move the arm and by morning couldnt move it at all. The kids rushed her to the doctor and they took xrays and nothing showed. Of course, everyone assumed the kids had done something but I knew she was fussy upon returning home from daycare the day before. Not only that...Cory wasnt even home...he had been working out of town and hadnt even been around the baby yet. I know it happened at daycare. Luckily nothing came of it. Arm got better in a day or two.

    You have to be so careful what you tell people and how you take care of kids these days. Hope all this gets straightened out.
  3. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    What a heartbreak but there are always two sides to every story and I believe we must be overcautious when a child's injuries are that severe.

  4. Cass1

    Cass1 New Member

    I understand that we have to be overcautious when it comes to children.When it comes to something they just automatically assume because of difficult child having issues when he was younger and because they are young parents,they should think of what they are doing to good peoples family.Thats not being overcautious thats just prejudice.They have no proven facts that say difficult child did anything wrong,the grandmother admitted the little girl fell down the stairs and landed on her left side of her head she didnt just fall from a few stairs she fell and didnt hit stairs going down she hit the cemment floor.If someone wanted to be overcautious it should have been the irrisponsable grandma by taking her to the hospital to get checked,which was a block away.
    This is tearing peoples lives apart.
  5. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    "If someone wanted to be overcautious it should have been the irrisponsable grandma by taking her to the hospital to get checked,which was a block away."

    I'm not sure I understand that.

    I'm not saying your son did anything Cass, but head trauma is a very serious thing and a child falling down all of the basement stairs and hitting their head on the cement...I don't know. It does sound like this child is not being monitored at the very least.

    I'm really sorry for your son, but if his main concern is for his daughter then he should do whatever it takes to prove that he is a good father and would not cause any harm.

  6. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    How is the child with the head injury, now? Is she okay?

    I hope this is resolved soon.
  7. Cass1

    Cass1 New Member

    difficult child has been trying to so hard to prove himself.This little girl doesnt have her father in her life and difficult child has always been good to her treating her like his own.The problem is no matter how hard difficult child is trying CAS is saying well we dont feel theres any improvement cause he cant own up to what he did.How do you own up to something you didnt do?I told her I know my difficult child and when he does something wrong he feels guilty and it eats away at him so he will talk to me about it and this has been going on for a year and believe me if he was guilty he wouldnt have been able to live with himself with out talking to me.There is no actual evidence either that can prove that he did anything wrong.
    I dont think admitting your guilty to something you didnt do is a way of proving your a good father and thats what CAS keeps saying they want.
    Nancy what I meant about the irrisponsable grandma was that she had the little girl staying at her place(not difficult child's)she lives a block away from the hospital and she has a basement door.If she had have been watching her like she was supposed to she wouldnt have fell.She should have been cautious by shutting the door and when she fell she shouldve took her to the hospital to get checked.I know you werent saying that difficult child did anything and Im sorry if I sounded that way.
    This whole situation just erks me,I hope you can understand.

    PS:difficult child has also been making an effort to get a job and he even went for appointment looking into getting his grade 12 at home.He says he figures its something he can do when he gets home from work.Him and his girlfriend are also going to a parenting group.
  8. Coookie

    Coookie Active Member


    Just sending hugs and saying prayers that this situation will work itself out for the best of all concerned. Sadly because of our difficult children history, be it accurately seen or not, the stigma is still there. :frown:

    I'm sorry my friend.
  9. Cass1

    Cass1 New Member

    As for the little girl she is totally fine shes back to her usual self she stayed in the hospital for about 2 weeks then she went to a foster home.I tried to have her come stay with me but because Im difficult child's mom and they figure he's guilty they wont allow her to come stay with us.difficult child's girlfriend doesnt seem to have any family thats willing to step up and the grandma doesnt seem to care geesh she didnt even come see her daughter when she had her last baby(my grandson)the poor girl had complications with her first one and couldve died the Dr said. Thats why they delivered this baby early and her mom couldnt even be there for her believe me its not like she had other plans.
    The kids and I go with girlfriend to see her on visits difficult child is not allowed so sometimes we video tape it and shes so cute saying Hi daddy ,I love you daddy ,I miss you daddy.
  10. Stella Johnson

    Stella Johnson Active Member

    What a nightmare. Hopefully he will be found innocent and CAS will have to give the poor little girl back to her mother.