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<blockquote data-quote="mamabear01" data-source="post: 274120" data-attributes="member: 7387"><p>Wiped out yes there is hope! I have read some of the posts and sat back and thought, yep she hated me, yep, I embarrassed her, yep I was fat, old and uncool too lololol. I went thru a phase with her where she was smoking crack and even took off at night (once for the weekend with her friend.) They ended up in juvy and it scared the carp outta her lol. </p><p> </p><p>Thank god it was only once (then she met her boyfriend shortly after which helped tremondously)</p><p> </p><p>So ya, been there, done that and own the T-shirt.</p><p> </p><p>But she told me after she matured.... she said mom, I heard everyword you said, but I didn't want you to know I did. Thanks for still loving me thru the rough times.</p><p> </p><p>I think the only thing that made a difference with how things turned out was that I tried to balance the control and punishment with actually sitting down having a discussion AND listening to her. Even if I disagreed, I listened. (I know some will disagree with me here, thats okay) like a friend would somtimes. So yes sometimes I wore my mamma hat, and sometimes I wore my friend hat. </p><p> </p><p>Anyway, she still has her moments tho. She's very arugementive (sp???) and has alot of anxiety still. She is set in her own ways and can be difficult, but I do believe thats just the way she will always be.</p><p> </p><p>Is she an Aspie? She could be midly, but all I know is she is in nursing school, making great grades and she is happier than I thought she would ever be. And thats a big relief.</p><p> </p><p>As for the boys...... they are a handful but the sweetiest guys you would ever want to meet. They have their oddity's but I wouldn't have them any other way. But whats the main problem now is behavior, meltdowns, ODD behavior and thats what we are struggling with now.</p><p> </p><p>They see a doctor for Cog therapy and are on medications, but I have been fighting for 2 yrs for an IEP and the school has been extremly difficult so I had to finally get a lawyer. Such a long story but we are in the midst of getting priv testing and the school paying for it so hopefully they will have an IEP written up by next year. </p><p> </p><p>I know more support in school will probably help with some of these behaviors because I do feel some of them are directly related to how their treated at school. I mean if you have a kid (s) who can't transition well, and needs structure and routine how do you think their gonna cope when the teacher always moves the desks around ect.... UGH I could go on and on, but I won't lol.</p><p> </p><p>One thing that really concerns me tho is for my grandson. Everyone looks at him and only see's ADHD, but I see sensory (always covering his ears) lining toys up, speech and Occupational Therapist (OT) issue's. He also has this light switching on and off thing and my daughter gets mad at me and won't do anything to get him evaluated. I know he could get early help and it is so important. But my daughter is very stuborn. So hopefully someone will see this when school comes around.</p><p> </p><p>Anyway thanks for the welcome. I do appreciate it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mamabear01, post: 274120, member: 7387"] Wiped out yes there is hope! I have read some of the posts and sat back and thought, yep she hated me, yep, I embarrassed her, yep I was fat, old and uncool too lololol. I went thru a phase with her where she was smoking crack and even took off at night (once for the weekend with her friend.) They ended up in juvy and it scared the carp outta her lol. Thank god it was only once (then she met her boyfriend shortly after which helped tremondously) So ya, been there, done that and own the T-shirt. But she told me after she matured.... she said mom, I heard everyword you said, but I didn't want you to know I did. Thanks for still loving me thru the rough times. I think the only thing that made a difference with how things turned out was that I tried to balance the control and punishment with actually sitting down having a discussion AND listening to her. Even if I disagreed, I listened. (I know some will disagree with me here, thats okay) like a friend would somtimes. So yes sometimes I wore my mamma hat, and sometimes I wore my friend hat. Anyway, she still has her moments tho. She's very arugementive (sp???) and has alot of anxiety still. She is set in her own ways and can be difficult, but I do believe thats just the way she will always be. Is she an Aspie? She could be midly, but all I know is she is in nursing school, making great grades and she is happier than I thought she would ever be. And thats a big relief. As for the boys...... they are a handful but the sweetiest guys you would ever want to meet. They have their oddity's but I wouldn't have them any other way. But whats the main problem now is behavior, meltdowns, ODD behavior and thats what we are struggling with now. They see a doctor for Cog therapy and are on medications, but I have been fighting for 2 yrs for an IEP and the school has been extremly difficult so I had to finally get a lawyer. Such a long story but we are in the midst of getting priv testing and the school paying for it so hopefully they will have an IEP written up by next year. I know more support in school will probably help with some of these behaviors because I do feel some of them are directly related to how their treated at school. I mean if you have a kid (s) who can't transition well, and needs structure and routine how do you think their gonna cope when the teacher always moves the desks around ect.... UGH I could go on and on, but I won't lol. One thing that really concerns me tho is for my grandson. Everyone looks at him and only see's ADHD, but I see sensory (always covering his ears) lining toys up, speech and Occupational Therapist (OT) issue's. He also has this light switching on and off thing and my daughter gets mad at me and won't do anything to get him evaluated. I know he could get early help and it is so important. But my daughter is very stuborn. So hopefully someone will see this when school comes around. Anyway thanks for the welcome. I do appreciate it. [/QUOTE]
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