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Parent Emeritus
Friends, I need your prayers and support again...
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 629124" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>I have put faith in the people difficult child daughter brings home (or has babies with) too, Try. One of them beat her nearly to death, over time, on purpose, just this past Thanksgiving. His trial is coming up, end of June. Federal stuff, Try, because of the viciousness of the beating. From that experience, I have taken that people do not change.</p><p></p><p>No matter what I believe.</p><p></p><p>No matter how much I want it to be better than it is.</p><p></p><p>Sometimes Try, it seems to me that if these people can get us to believe in them...I don't know. Is that another kind of win for them? What I tell myself now, for today, is that the situation is what it is because my difficult child daughter is attracted to the kind of men she is attracted to. I don't know why, but I do know they are dangerous, non-law abiding persons with whom I would have nothing in this world to do, were it not for my child.</p><p></p><p>So, what I am trying really, really hard to learn, is that there are things I will do to help my children, and that I will not go one step further. </p><p></p><p>One of those things is never to believe again that someone who has not yet changed is capable of changing. They like what they are doing, Try.</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry. I am disillusioned by what happened to my daughter. I don't want to see you in that place. Or myself, ever again.</p><p></p><p>Whatever your rules are for engaging with your child Try, stick to them. Remember what you need to see to continue to help her, and do not bend on that.</p><p></p><p>The only solid ground we have Try, is the ground we create.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>That makes it so much harder. What is it you need to see Try, to justify your faith in your child? If you can picture that clearly, it will give you a touchstone, a place to stand up.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Do stay close, Try. I have posted so much personal information here that it scares me, sometimes. But the site is anonymous. We have been where you are. We can stand by you, whatever the outcome.</p><p></p><p>We are powerless, Try. We love our children, and we are powerless before their self destructive determination.</p><p></p><p>But we do have one another, here.</p><p></p><p>I will hold you and your daughter in my thoughts and prayers, Try.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 629124, member: 17461"] I have put faith in the people difficult child daughter brings home (or has babies with) too, Try. One of them beat her nearly to death, over time, on purpose, just this past Thanksgiving. His trial is coming up, end of June. Federal stuff, Try, because of the viciousness of the beating. From that experience, I have taken that people do not change. No matter what I believe. No matter how much I want it to be better than it is. Sometimes Try, it seems to me that if these people can get us to believe in them...I don't know. Is that another kind of win for them? What I tell myself now, for today, is that the situation is what it is because my difficult child daughter is attracted to the kind of men she is attracted to. I don't know why, but I do know they are dangerous, non-law abiding persons with whom I would have nothing in this world to do, were it not for my child. So, what I am trying really, really hard to learn, is that there are things I will do to help my children, and that I will not go one step further. One of those things is never to believe again that someone who has not yet changed is capable of changing. They like what they are doing, Try. I'm sorry. I am disillusioned by what happened to my daughter. I don't want to see you in that place. Or myself, ever again. Whatever your rules are for engaging with your child Try, stick to them. Remember what you need to see to continue to help her, and do not bend on that. The only solid ground we have Try, is the ground we create. That makes it so much harder. What is it you need to see Try, to justify your faith in your child? If you can picture that clearly, it will give you a touchstone, a place to stand up. Do stay close, Try. I have posted so much personal information here that it scares me, sometimes. But the site is anonymous. We have been where you are. We can stand by you, whatever the outcome. We are powerless, Try. We love our children, and we are powerless before their self destructive determination. But we do have one another, here. I will hold you and your daughter in my thoughts and prayers, Try. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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