Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Robinboots, Feb 5, 2010.

  1. Robinboots

    Robinboots New Member

    Thought I'd post an update, haven't been around for awhile. It's just too tiring sometimes.

    difficult child went back to court for a probation dispostion hearing on Thursday. Judge did NOT release him, but set another date in June. Added 15 hours' community service, and told him to get his act together, that he had a lot of opportunities and he's blown them left and right. So, he's still on probation, he has to finish all the stuff to get ready to go to college (again) and document it for the judge.

    I told the judge that the letter from his FFM was bogus, difficult child had only been up to her office for 7 hours, not 25. Hence the additional comm. svc. hours.

    I also said that while difficult child wasn't doing anything criminal, as far as I knew, and he's past the age for status offenses, that I was very, very concerned about his ethics. I also told the judge that yes, he's done some positive things, but also negative things. Still.

    Good news, I guess, is that he is STILL accountable to the court, and the Risperdal has prevented any blow-ups.

    I'm very tired though. I hope he gets it together, but I'm not doing a blasted thing - HE will have to do/document and HE will have to arrange his comm. svc. And keep checking in with his DJO, which he'd been doing except for the last two weeks. Funny, the night before court he started signing up for the SAT and getting his letter from FFM, etc.

    Oh, and on the way home I was harangued about how it was alll MY fault, 'cause I told the judge...the truth. Sigh.
  2. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    I hate it when they dump their responsibilities back onto other people.

    If he had done the right things, you wouldn't have had anything negative to say to the judge. And what would have happened, long term, if you had NOT been honest with the judge? What would he have learned from that?

    Thanks for the update.

  3. Star*

    Star* call 911

    Hey Bootsey,

    I've been thinking a lot about you and my wayward nephew. Wondered what was up.

    AND BRAVO to you MOM for sticking up for what was right. It couldn't have been easy to stand in front of a judge and do the right thing, but it had to be done. You should give yourself a pat on the back, I'm giving you a hug. WOW! WAY TO GO!!!!!

    As far as the kid doing mememememememememeem in the car on the way home......Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww (here's a pity party for him) () there.
    Expect that and then *poof* my standard reply was usually "Wow too bad no one else was in the car for you to blame your mistakes on, you probably could have kept going for another 20 minutes at LEAST."

    Don't sweat the small stuff Mom....You're doing fantastic!!

  4. neednewtechnique

    neednewtechnique New Member

    Wow, sounds like there is a lot going on with your difficult child. Mine is about to hit the courtroom in a couple of weeks for her first ever appearance...but she is charged with all the little things that our juvie judge is "sensitive" about, such as skipping school, hitting your parents, I expect them to give her all kinds of h***. I already told mine that I was telling the judge the truth. I told her that I will not break the law and LIE to an officer of the court to keep her out of trouble, she knew what she was getting into when they charged her...the probation officer even gave her a chance to NOT have to go to court, and she blew it off...