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GFH in custody
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<blockquote data-quote="Dancerat" data-source="post: 609069" data-attributes="member: 14984"><p>Thanks for all your comments; I truly appreciate them. I'm still at work, wrapping up. Cleaning my desk off so I have a nice fresh start to tomorrow.</p><p></p><p>Well, although I understand MWM comments, I just haven't gotten to the point where I can ignore a 19 year old that got put in jail without at least telling her parents. Yes, she is a young adult. Yes, she made bad decisions and will probably continue to make bad decisions for a while, but my thoughts really weren't so much of her consequences, but more of parental duty to notify other parental units. No matter how awful my son was, and though I might prefer that he is in jail for something, I would at least want to *know* that he was in jail. I can't imagine a mother of a 19 year old daughter who wouldn't want to know that her daughter was safe, even if she was in an orange jumpsuit. And in addition, she does work for a living and I wanted her parents to handle getting her car and clothes, that are parked in my driveway. And someone, not me, should call her work and tell them something. I think there is a difference between consequences and losing a job that is the only source of money they have.</p><p></p><p>And also, my difficult child needed to see that these parents were not as god awful as GFH had made them out to be to him. In fact, they were not really as she had described them; anything to try and break the spell she has over him would be good to me. </p><p></p><p>In addition, I would hope that the ordeal of being arrested, booked and brought into county jail for the first time would be a huge wake up call to someone that has not been there before. </p><p></p><p>I have been told that I am overly nice; maybe I am. I'm just not quite that person yet, that can say, yes, she's an adult, stay in jail without contact from parents. In fact, even though I read all these posts, I still struggle with that concept, but I do understand that its part of detachment. I rather feel like I am defending myself on this board. But, yes, in one way I am glad to not have had the money to bail her out. So, I revisited the website and the assault VI charge has been dropped and only the methadone one remains. I am trying to read about methadone. Does anyone have anything to recommend to read about it? My son didn't really know what it was, I think he got it mixed up with crystal meth, at least that was the conversation I overheard him having with his sister.</p><p></p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/smile.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":smile:" title="smile :smile:" data-shortname=":smile:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dancerat, post: 609069, member: 14984"] Thanks for all your comments; I truly appreciate them. I'm still at work, wrapping up. Cleaning my desk off so I have a nice fresh start to tomorrow. Well, although I understand MWM comments, I just haven't gotten to the point where I can ignore a 19 year old that got put in jail without at least telling her parents. Yes, she is a young adult. Yes, she made bad decisions and will probably continue to make bad decisions for a while, but my thoughts really weren't so much of her consequences, but more of parental duty to notify other parental units. No matter how awful my son was, and though I might prefer that he is in jail for something, I would at least want to *know* that he was in jail. I can't imagine a mother of a 19 year old daughter who wouldn't want to know that her daughter was safe, even if she was in an orange jumpsuit. And in addition, she does work for a living and I wanted her parents to handle getting her car and clothes, that are parked in my driveway. And someone, not me, should call her work and tell them something. I think there is a difference between consequences and losing a job that is the only source of money they have. And also, my difficult child needed to see that these parents were not as god awful as GFH had made them out to be to him. In fact, they were not really as she had described them; anything to try and break the spell she has over him would be good to me. In addition, I would hope that the ordeal of being arrested, booked and brought into county jail for the first time would be a huge wake up call to someone that has not been there before. I have been told that I am overly nice; maybe I am. I'm just not quite that person yet, that can say, yes, she's an adult, stay in jail without contact from parents. In fact, even though I read all these posts, I still struggle with that concept, but I do understand that its part of detachment. I rather feel like I am defending myself on this board. But, yes, in one way I am glad to not have had the money to bail her out. So, I revisited the website and the assault VI charge has been dropped and only the methadone one remains. I am trying to read about methadone. Does anyone have anything to recommend to read about it? My son didn't really know what it was, I think he got it mixed up with crystal meth, at least that was the conversation I overheard him having with his sister. :smile: [/QUOTE]
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