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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 258546" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>My son is very intelligent, but his main interests are videogames and cartoons (at 15). This is sort of common for Aspies. Often they have to be prodded to be active (my son is in Special Olympics to keep him active). He also swims great and is a wonderful soccer goalie, but he's quiet. I think he will need some assisted living and perhaps special help finding a job that suits him and many Aspies collect Disability on top of being placed in jobs that THEY CAN DO. You have no choice but to alter your expectations. Your child has a bonafide disability. He isn't lazy or bad or rebellious or stupid or anything like that. He has Aspergers and, worse, has NOT had the proper Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) interventions. He also doesn't seem to be one of the few Aspies who are brilliant. Some can live independently, but often they are lonely anyway because a good chunk of them don't marry or have kids because they don't meet women--or can't. Then there are those like my son who say "Having a girlfriend would really be a pain" and "I never EVER want to get married." He means it for now. I have other kids for that--I get pleasure from THIS child in other ways--he is sweet and compassionate and smart and has a great sense of humor and he does have some friends, although often he'd rather be alone. </p><p>If you don't alter your expectations, you will never accept your son. He may need assisted living and a sheltered worshop, but he is still your child and lovable and has redeeming traits that you can learn to enjoy. There are services for adults with disabilities. Many adults on the spectrum need to utilize them and are very happy without going to college or getting married. Parental ideals aren't always what our kids want, even our "typical" children.</p><p>I wish you luck. You really need to learn about Aspergers/Autistic Spectrum Disorder.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 258546, member: 1550"] My son is very intelligent, but his main interests are videogames and cartoons (at 15). This is sort of common for Aspies. Often they have to be prodded to be active (my son is in Special Olympics to keep him active). He also swims great and is a wonderful soccer goalie, but he's quiet. I think he will need some assisted living and perhaps special help finding a job that suits him and many Aspies collect Disability on top of being placed in jobs that THEY CAN DO. You have no choice but to alter your expectations. Your child has a bonafide disability. He isn't lazy or bad or rebellious or stupid or anything like that. He has Aspergers and, worse, has NOT had the proper Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) interventions. He also doesn't seem to be one of the few Aspies who are brilliant. Some can live independently, but often they are lonely anyway because a good chunk of them don't marry or have kids because they don't meet women--or can't. Then there are those like my son who say "Having a girlfriend would really be a pain" and "I never EVER want to get married." He means it for now. I have other kids for that--I get pleasure from THIS child in other ways--he is sweet and compassionate and smart and has a great sense of humor and he does have some friends, although often he'd rather be alone. If you don't alter your expectations, you will never accept your son. He may need assisted living and a sheltered worshop, but he is still your child and lovable and has redeeming traits that you can learn to enjoy. There are services for adults with disabilities. Many adults on the spectrum need to utilize them and are very happy without going to college or getting married. Parental ideals aren't always what our kids want, even our "typical" children. I wish you luck. You really need to learn about Aspergers/Autistic Spectrum Disorder. [/QUOTE]
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