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Good for a difficult child??
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 182874" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Sounds like a great way for MOM to handle things. AND it sounds like he is working very hard to not blow up.</p><p> </p><p>As for the 1/2 to the no-show fee and 1/2 to him, I think that it will save you a TON of problems.</p><p> </p><p>My dad (my expert on kids, esp boys, in the middle school/jr high age) would recommend this. We did it with Wiz many times. If ALL the $$ goes to fees, or to pay for stuff he breaks, then your difficult child has very little incentive to keep working. I know my parents get much better results when they use this method than when they use all the $ to pay for the fee.</p><p> </p><p>Also, kids who have a little bit of "walking around $$" are MUCH less likely to NOT steal than kids who do not have that little bit of $. They are even more likely to save to a larger goal - I have $$ so I could buy this pice of junk, but I want a new game, so I can live with-o the junk and then get my game sooner.</p><p> </p><p>Takes time to come to this realization, but many kids do come to this decison - or so my dad has always claimed.</p><p> </p><p>By little bit of $$ he always meant enough to get a coke and candy bar. It was the rule of thumb he used with my bro and I, and taught us to use with our kids. So it was $0.25 for the candy and $0.30 for coke when I was first able to go for a walk to the corner store, and now it is $1.39 for the coke and $0.89 for the candy bar. But it is what we used.</p><p> </p><p>I tink you and your difficult child do a pretty good job of listening to how each other thinks and approaching problems collaboratively. glad to see your difficult child working to control his temper!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 182874, member: 1233"] Sounds like a great way for MOM to handle things. AND it sounds like he is working very hard to not blow up. As for the 1/2 to the no-show fee and 1/2 to him, I think that it will save you a TON of problems. My dad (my expert on kids, esp boys, in the middle school/jr high age) would recommend this. We did it with Wiz many times. If ALL the $$ goes to fees, or to pay for stuff he breaks, then your difficult child has very little incentive to keep working. I know my parents get much better results when they use this method than when they use all the $ to pay for the fee. Also, kids who have a little bit of "walking around $$" are MUCH less likely to NOT steal than kids who do not have that little bit of $. They are even more likely to save to a larger goal - I have $$ so I could buy this pice of junk, but I want a new game, so I can live with-o the junk and then get my game sooner. Takes time to come to this realization, but many kids do come to this decison - or so my dad has always claimed. By little bit of $$ he always meant enough to get a coke and candy bar. It was the rule of thumb he used with my bro and I, and taught us to use with our kids. So it was $0.25 for the candy and $0.30 for coke when I was first able to go for a walk to the corner store, and now it is $1.39 for the coke and $0.89 for the candy bar. But it is what we used. I tink you and your difficult child do a pretty good job of listening to how each other thinks and approaching problems collaboratively. glad to see your difficult child working to control his temper! [/QUOTE]
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