Good thoughts for hubby, please

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by hearts and roses, Apr 5, 2012.

  1. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    I know there are more pressing issues on today's agenda for so many of you....but my H is suffering terribly with depression and it's in part due to his business. He's a carpenter and business is out there, but people and contractors are unwilling to pay the appropriate rates - seems there is always some hack out there who will do the job for less. And, trust me, my H does not over charge for his work and does beautiful work. He has a couple of contractors that he's worked with for over 15 years and they love him because he always goes above and beyond without over charging them...which is great for them, but all my H gets out of it is a day's pay and then struggles to cover his overheads like insurance and fuel costs.

    He's been keeping busy with smallish jobs but it seems something always happens so instead of him making good money on a job that should take 3 days...the job may take two weeks and he makes less money - he is paid by the job, not the day so when he prices out a job, the length of time it will take is factored in. The job he's on now was supposed to take 4 days - it was a fill in job between larger jobs. Well, the contractor pulled the wrong permit so the building inspector put a stop order on the job until further notice. So, now the job has taken up to two weeks - other stalls occurred due to weather, cement not drying, etc. H is frustrated and depressed. He comes home and is like a beaten dog, just wants to crawl onto the couch and sleep.

    If you can spare it, please send up a good prayer or some positive juju that he hits on a GOOD job and makes some money to get back in the swing of things! Thanks!
  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh Jo...prayers going out. I know how he feels. Tony is in construction too and the things your H is going through are the reason he wont go out on his own. But even working for this guy he is so frustrated. He doesnt make squat and they are feeling the pain. Tony drives over 2 hours each way to work and its killing him.

    I will keep your H in my prayers.
  3. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Thanks, Janet - and I'll keep Tony in mine. It's amazing to H how many guys who have found themselves in the unemployment line have taken up hammer and ladder and call themselves carpenters without any real life experience to back them up and then they go out there and lowball every professional in town. Grrrr. I hope things turn around soon. H is always looking for another way to make a living. He's incredibly bright but does not have a college degree - he has talked about becoming a shop teacher over the past few years. I've tried encouraging him to go to school, but because he's working ALL THE TIME, he wonders when he would be able to go...and do homework...etc. So, for now I just keep hoping that the next BIG job is right around the bend. People are being very cautious in how they spend their money and many people aren't do home improvement until they become absolutely necessary. We live in a fairly affluent state and area, business is moving, just very conservatively and slowly.
  4. Tiapet

    Tiapet Old Hand

    I will keep him in my thoughts and put in an extra thought that a really nice, new job comes along.
  5. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    I feel for him! The same thing happened in the graphic design industry - hacks with a computer call themselves a "professional designer" and will charge cut-rate fees for advertising, logos and designs. The REAL designers are forced to compete with these bozos...and ultimately everybody loses.

    I will cross my fingers that he gets more customer referrals based upon his high-quality work and business goes well...
  6. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Jo, I'm so sorry. Sending good vibes and hoping for a breakthrough in the job market.

    I remember this happened in the IT industry after the technology boom went bust in 2000/2001. A lot of hacks entered the field and were charging bargain basement rates. It took about 18 months for all the dissatisfied clients to wise up and realize that paying rock bottom rates and then having to hire someone competent to fix the resulting mess was not saving them any money.
    Hoping that it takes the renovation customers a much shorter time to see the light.
  7. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Thinking of him Jo, sorry for the struggles. I hope he can figure a way to factor an add on rate into his contracts if time lines change through no fault of his own. My dad was self employed and we grew up with good years and super hard years..... It is a huge challenge.
  8. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I will keep your husband in my prayers. It's rough out there right now for sure.

    Janet, I've kept Tony in mine for both the job and Buck situation. ;)

  9. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    It's amazing how strong the link is between a man and his work. I truly believe that H walks a lot taller and exudes more confidence when he has good jobs going and lined up. Makes him feel like a good hard working, strong man, a good provider. I want to see that guy again. Right now he's just down and like a floundering fish, struggling. Usually by this time of year, our phone is ringing off the hook!!!

    Thanks ladies~
  10. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Which comes first? It's a chicken-and-egg question, but they used to tell professional sales staff that you had to come across as confident - even if you had to fake it. Maybe he needs to just kick his own butt, and fake that successful posture etc. because if he doesn't do that, it works against him in the work world.
  11. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    You are in my prayers for perfect jobs and prosperity and abundance to come in on all levels, bringing more then you even imagined!
  12. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Sending good thoughts for all our struggling spouses and SO's.
  13. Jody

    Jody Active Member


    Prayers said. Hope the phone starts ringing off the hook for you guys. Hugs.
  14. greenrene

    greenrene Member

    Oh goodness, how I have been there done that... My husband used to be a contractor - he is SO talented and does beautiful work, especially with tile. We did pretty decently until shortly after 9/11, then suddenly instead of being able to run 2 crews and employ several people, it became SO difficult to find work, especially in winter. Ugh.

    I hope things turn around for your husband and he gets his mojo back.
  15. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Winter is a hard time for residential especially up north. Tony works in commercial metal studs and drywall. For your H, he really cant do anything like concrete work or painting or much outdoor work in the really cold winter. Down here we arent quite as cold but the economy has kept the commercial building from going up. Tony is doing lots of little jobs like banks or reno's on small grocery stores.
  16. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Adding in good thoughts and prayers for your husband.
  17. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Thank you everyone! I know there are so many of you/us with more pressing issues. I'm so grateful for you all putting any extra thought out there for me and H.

    Tonight he came home with blue prints for a big job! Now he just has to negotiate the price and pay schedule. Fingers crossed!
  18. Marcie Mac

    Marcie Mac Just Plain Ole Tired

    Fingers crossed. Can't he advertise or work on his own (sorry if I missed what kind of carpentry he does)? I know SO is absolutely misery to live with when he has no storage jobs to do

  19. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    In 17 years, H hasn't had to advertise as he's been busy, even I n winter. He has a lot of contacts and repeat customers, word of mouth, etc. Everyone is slow it seems. He is self employed, he subcontracts for builders and other contractors. Thanks!
  20. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    Hugs to you and your husband, mine is in the construction business as well. The large casino he was a general foreman on, ran out of money to pay the last HALF installment that was supposed to come at the end. Do you know how many peole are going to go out of business because of this? This is what Donald Trump ALWAYS does, construction companies put a lien on his properties before they step foot in to do work, because he won't pay otherwise.

    This is not a Trump casino, however, it's open as of Monday, brand new and DEAD. Nobody is there! You would think being new, people would rush over, but,no, it's scary. The whole construction business is having hard times. Prayers to you and your husband.