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General Parenting
Grandparents and a lack of thought!
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 571537" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>You have gotten good advice. I cannot help but wonder how ths dynamic started and becam entrenched. It is your home, your rules, your kid. If you don't want her to have the shoes now, take them away. So what if you are the 'bad guy'? You are supposed to be. It is your JOB. If you work to be her 'friend', both of you but esp your daughter, lose out in a huge way. SHe NEEDS you to stand firm and hold that boundary as she does all she can think of to push past it. This is one way that she will learn to function in society. </p><p></p><p>Your relationship with your parents sounds like you are still mostly their daughter rather than the mother of their grands. You are allowing them to set the rules in your home, even when they do not work for you or the rest of the family. That isn't healthy and you need to do some soul searching and figure out why you are not enforcing your boundaries. Your kids will have a tough time learning these fi you don't model them.</p><p></p><p>I urge you to seek some counseling. It can be at a private office, through the community resources, your job may have an employee assistance program, through a church, etc... I also urge you to read Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. I think you wiill find the book helpful.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 571537, member: 1233"] You have gotten good advice. I cannot help but wonder how ths dynamic started and becam entrenched. It is your home, your rules, your kid. If you don't want her to have the shoes now, take them away. So what if you are the 'bad guy'? You are supposed to be. It is your JOB. If you work to be her 'friend', both of you but esp your daughter, lose out in a huge way. SHe NEEDS you to stand firm and hold that boundary as she does all she can think of to push past it. This is one way that she will learn to function in society. Your relationship with your parents sounds like you are still mostly their daughter rather than the mother of their grands. You are allowing them to set the rules in your home, even when they do not work for you or the rest of the family. That isn't healthy and you need to do some soul searching and figure out why you are not enforcing your boundaries. Your kids will have a tough time learning these fi you don't model them. I urge you to seek some counseling. It can be at a private office, through the community resources, your job may have an employee assistance program, through a church, etc... I also urge you to read Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. I think you wiill find the book helpful. [/QUOTE]
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