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Greiving for your children
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<blockquote data-quote="gottaloveem" data-source="post: 66330" data-attributes="member: 1953"><p>Jen had brought this up on Janets' "they got him post". Jen had mentioned to Janet: </p><p></p><p>&gt;&gt;&gt;You certainly are grieinving, but is not a death grief that has an ending.&lt;&lt;&lt;</p><p></p><p>That is a very true statement. Worrying about your wayward child is extremely unsettling. It is the not knowing what is going to happen that can be very depressing. Waiting for court dates, for drug test results, waiting for placements, either by the court or yourselves it is just so distressing because you want more for your child. You keep hanging on to the hope, but many times that hope is dashed because they keep on messing up. </p><p></p><p>Certainly it is not the same as grieving a child who has died, but it is almost as distressing. When Alex died, all the worry, stress, anxiety, left my consciousness, Now I am really grieving but I know what I am grieving. Does that make sense? It is a different grief. I'm not as anxious because the unknown has been answered. Now my mind knows what to be sad about, and that causes me less anxiety. Please don't get me wrong, grieving my son who died is terrible and very painful. I just know what the outcome is. I grieve because my son is not in our lives and never will be, and I grieve for the son that never had a chance to be the nice young man I hoped he would be. The drugs stole my son and kept the nice young man he could've been far away from us.</p><p></p><p>I just wanted to take the time and tell all of you that are struggling with your children that I am so sorry. It is a mothers biggest heartache. You are truly grieving and don't let anybody else tell you otherwise.</p><p></p><p>Hopefully we can have some more success stories. </p><p></p><p>I am so proud of the kids who have "seen the light" and are looking for ways to make their lives brighter. The kids who have decided to change their lives so they can live a nice long productive life.The kids who have given up drugs and or a criminal lifestyle. Kudos to all of you and please make it. Your moms and dads hearts need a break.</p><p></p><p>Take care of your broken hearts. You need to.</p><p></p><p></p><p>(((HUGS)))</p><p></p><p>Lia</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gottaloveem, post: 66330, member: 1953"] Jen had brought this up on Janets' "they got him post". Jen had mentioned to Janet: >>>You certainly are grieinving, but is not a death grief that has an ending.<<< That is a very true statement. Worrying about your wayward child is extremely unsettling. It is the not knowing what is going to happen that can be very depressing. Waiting for court dates, for drug test results, waiting for placements, either by the court or yourselves it is just so distressing because you want more for your child. You keep hanging on to the hope, but many times that hope is dashed because they keep on messing up. Certainly it is not the same as grieving a child who has died, but it is almost as distressing. When Alex died, all the worry, stress, anxiety, left my consciousness, Now I am really grieving but I know what I am grieving. Does that make sense? It is a different grief. I'm not as anxious because the unknown has been answered. Now my mind knows what to be sad about, and that causes me less anxiety. Please don't get me wrong, grieving my son who died is terrible and very painful. I just know what the outcome is. I grieve because my son is not in our lives and never will be, and I grieve for the son that never had a chance to be the nice young man I hoped he would be. The drugs stole my son and kept the nice young man he could've been far away from us. I just wanted to take the time and tell all of you that are struggling with your children that I am so sorry. It is a mothers biggest heartache. You are truly grieving and don't let anybody else tell you otherwise. Hopefully we can have some more success stories. I am so proud of the kids who have "seen the light" and are looking for ways to make their lives brighter. The kids who have decided to change their lives so they can live a nice long productive life.The kids who have given up drugs and or a criminal lifestyle. Kudos to all of you and please make it. Your moms and dads hearts need a break. Take care of your broken hearts. You need to. (((HUGS))) Lia [/QUOTE]
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