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grieving my son
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<blockquote data-quote="jbrain" data-source="post: 93684" data-attributes="member: 3450"><p>I guess I managed to re-find my identity after my husband died (10 yrs ago). I kind of went wild for awhile but I found out I love to dance and in fact met my present husband at a contra dance. We took swing dance lessons together too so dancing has been a big part of our lives together as a couple. I also took a belly dancing class and that was really fun, just for me. </p><p></p><p>A few years ago I got up the courage to join a singing group, called Mostly Motown. I had seen them perform before and thought it would be fun but was scared to try since I haven't sung as part of a group since jr. high. I have been with them now for several years and have so much fun and have had to get out of my comfort zone (performing solos and having lines to say in skits). I have found I love the "acting" part--I love performing--never knew that!</p><p></p><p>I think it really is important to have something that is just for you that you feel good about and where you are just yourself. I love being just "Jane"---when I am with my group I am not a mom, a wife, employee, I am just myself. People don't relate to me in those other roles, they relate to me as a singer and comedic actress. </p><p></p><p>I expect it also is good to be role models for our kids. I remember how much happier my mom seemed when she started working when I was 9 yrs old. I didn't like it that she wasn't there all the time for me but as I grew older I think I saw that she was a person, not just a mom. She also had her own interests she pursued. I really admire her--she is 85 yrs old and goes to her aerobics class 3 times a week, takes many trips since she loves to travel, gets together with friends often, loves the Dallas Mavericks, and til just this past week was continuing to substitute teach elementary school a couple times a week. I think I learned from her how to be a person and not just a role.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jbrain, post: 93684, member: 3450"] I guess I managed to re-find my identity after my husband died (10 yrs ago). I kind of went wild for awhile but I found out I love to dance and in fact met my present husband at a contra dance. We took swing dance lessons together too so dancing has been a big part of our lives together as a couple. I also took a belly dancing class and that was really fun, just for me. A few years ago I got up the courage to join a singing group, called Mostly Motown. I had seen them perform before and thought it would be fun but was scared to try since I haven't sung as part of a group since jr. high. I have been with them now for several years and have so much fun and have had to get out of my comfort zone (performing solos and having lines to say in skits). I have found I love the "acting" part--I love performing--never knew that! I think it really is important to have something that is just for you that you feel good about and where you are just yourself. I love being just "Jane"---when I am with my group I am not a mom, a wife, employee, I am just myself. People don't relate to me in those other roles, they relate to me as a singer and comedic actress. I expect it also is good to be role models for our kids. I remember how much happier my mom seemed when she started working when I was 9 yrs old. I didn't like it that she wasn't there all the time for me but as I grew older I think I saw that she was a person, not just a mom. She also had her own interests she pursued. I really admire her--she is 85 yrs old and goes to her aerobics class 3 times a week, takes many trips since she loves to travel, gets together with friends often, loves the Dallas Mavericks, and til just this past week was continuing to substitute teach elementary school a couple times a week. I think I learned from her how to be a person and not just a role. [/QUOTE]
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