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H, mother in law, Step One down
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 463144" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>So glad to hear you have brother in law on your side...that's major! Evidently there are a number of choices in your area as well as brother in law's. Because we live in an area with many many senior citizens there are alot of choices here, too. The term "assisted living facility" conjures a picture of "incompetence" with many seniors. Most of our alf's are lovely, have full dining rooms (some with Chef's), buses for transportation for those on the go as well as planned recreation. They have apartments...some smaller and some larger (including kitchens). </p><p></p><p>I'm not sure what her actual condition is or isn't. As a senior myself, however, I would be drawn to a "retirement community" in lieu of as alf. There is a different degree of independence and different dynamics at both types of developments. There is more than one that allows you to "step down" from having your own home when you are independent, to an alf when you no longer want to be bothered keeping your place and subsequently to a nursing home level once you become unable to care for yourself. Maintenance is available (for a fee, of course) if you have your own place so you are not encumbered by lawn concerns or cleaning concerns.</p><p></p><p>Just tossing senior perceptions into your mix. If she is capable of independence and is assured she will have regular visits plus invitations for visits at your home, perhaps the decision will come easier. Regardless of age the loss of your lifetime partner is stressful and frightening. Most seniors fear being warehoused. Living at your home would not be peaceful for any of you. I'm sorry husband did it again and hoping that resolution comes soon. Is she eager to leave Florida, her home and her friends? It may just be a knee jerk reaction to her greif and lack of identify. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 463144, member: 35"] So glad to hear you have brother in law on your side...that's major! Evidently there are a number of choices in your area as well as brother in law's. Because we live in an area with many many senior citizens there are alot of choices here, too. The term "assisted living facility" conjures a picture of "incompetence" with many seniors. Most of our alf's are lovely, have full dining rooms (some with Chef's), buses for transportation for those on the go as well as planned recreation. They have apartments...some smaller and some larger (including kitchens). I'm not sure what her actual condition is or isn't. As a senior myself, however, I would be drawn to a "retirement community" in lieu of as alf. There is a different degree of independence and different dynamics at both types of developments. There is more than one that allows you to "step down" from having your own home when you are independent, to an alf when you no longer want to be bothered keeping your place and subsequently to a nursing home level once you become unable to care for yourself. Maintenance is available (for a fee, of course) if you have your own place so you are not encumbered by lawn concerns or cleaning concerns. Just tossing senior perceptions into your mix. If she is capable of independence and is assured she will have regular visits plus invitations for visits at your home, perhaps the decision will come easier. Regardless of age the loss of your lifetime partner is stressful and frightening. Most seniors fear being warehoused. Living at your home would not be peaceful for any of you. I'm sorry husband did it again and hoping that resolution comes soon. Is she eager to leave Florida, her home and her friends? It may just be a knee jerk reaction to her greif and lack of identify. DDD [/QUOTE]
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