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Substance Abuse
Handling the holidays.
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<blockquote data-quote="Signorina" data-source="post: 614664"><p>Lil, why on earth would you allow your son to enroll for a second semester if he failed all of his classes? In fact, having been in that very situation w my own difficult child - who failed every class his 3rd semester at school - I would be very surprised if the school allowed him to enroll at all. You may want to check the guidelines; difficult child's school suspended him for a semester and he could have gone back for a semester on probation after a 1 semester suspension , but he was required to bring his cumulative gpa up to a 2.0 to continue beyond that. We did the math, it would have been nearly impossible for him to get the grades necessary to offset the failed semester.</p><p></p><p>At this point, I would be telling my difficult child to find an alternate plan including a self supporting job. I also would be strongly encouraging him to request "W"s in lieu of "F"s and to get counseling. That was our advice to our difficult child when we were in your very shoes 2 years ago. My son had a serious girlfriend and was living in an apartment at school and balked at the last moment but came very close to accepting our advice. I wish we could have gotten through to him; we didn't find out he failed until he was a week away from heading back to school. Had I known, I might have started off Christmas break by booking regular appointments for counseling (even just my own- if difficult child refused to go) and setting stronger guidelines but hindsight is 20/20. In my experience, Christmas break started off well, we played nicely but it deteriorated rapidly after Christmas and ended with difficult child leaving us in fury & hatred. </p><p></p><p>That failed semester haunts my difficult child and has long reaching repercussions. He wanted to attend uni this year, but can't get in anywhere because of his gpa. He's stuck going to community college on a conditional acceptance basis and he thinks it's beneath him. I doubt that he's even going to class or if so, doing well.(day of reckoning is ahead) He tried to appeal his failed semester requesting a change to a withdrawal status but it was too late by now. So, at the very least; I might encourage your difficult child to do that right away. </p><p></p><p>I don't see any good coming from your difficult child heading back to school. I think you should have a backup plan. Sorry to sound so negative. But I've been there done that and it made things so much worse for us</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Signorina, post: 614664"] Lil, why on earth would you allow your son to enroll for a second semester if he failed all of his classes? In fact, having been in that very situation w my own difficult child - who failed every class his 3rd semester at school - I would be very surprised if the school allowed him to enroll at all. You may want to check the guidelines; difficult child's school suspended him for a semester and he could have gone back for a semester on probation after a 1 semester suspension , but he was required to bring his cumulative gpa up to a 2.0 to continue beyond that. We did the math, it would have been nearly impossible for him to get the grades necessary to offset the failed semester. At this point, I would be telling my difficult child to find an alternate plan including a self supporting job. I also would be strongly encouraging him to request "W"s in lieu of "F"s and to get counseling. That was our advice to our difficult child when we were in your very shoes 2 years ago. My son had a serious girlfriend and was living in an apartment at school and balked at the last moment but came very close to accepting our advice. I wish we could have gotten through to him; we didn't find out he failed until he was a week away from heading back to school. Had I known, I might have started off Christmas break by booking regular appointments for counseling (even just my own- if difficult child refused to go) and setting stronger guidelines but hindsight is 20/20. In my experience, Christmas break started off well, we played nicely but it deteriorated rapidly after Christmas and ended with difficult child leaving us in fury & hatred. That failed semester haunts my difficult child and has long reaching repercussions. He wanted to attend uni this year, but can't get in anywhere because of his gpa. He's stuck going to community college on a conditional acceptance basis and he thinks it's beneath him. I doubt that he's even going to class or if so, doing well.(day of reckoning is ahead) He tried to appeal his failed semester requesting a change to a withdrawal status but it was too late by now. So, at the very least; I might encourage your difficult child to do that right away. I don't see any good coming from your difficult child heading back to school. I think you should have a backup plan. Sorry to sound so negative. But I've been there done that and it made things so much worse for us [/QUOTE]
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